1. 爱意味着我关心我所爱的人的幸福。只要我的关心是真诚的，我的关心对我所爱的人就不会是一种压制，也不会是一种占有性的依附。

Love means that I care about the welfare of the person I love. To the extent that it is genuine, my caring is not a smothering of the person Ｏr a possessive clinging.

2. 如果我关心你，我就会关注你的成长，并希望你会成为你能成为的样子。

If I care about you, I\'m concerned about your growth, Ａnd I hope you will become all that you can become.

3．因此，对你为完善自己人格所做的一切，我决不设置障碍，即使你做的事情有时会让我不舒服。

Consequently, I don\'t put up roadblocks to what you do that enhances you as a person, even though it may result in my discomfort at times.

4．爱是自由的行为，爱是自愿地付出，而不是在需求之下的施舍。

Love is freeing. Love is feely given, not doled out on demand.

5．同时，我对你的爱不取决于你是否满足我对你的期望。真正的爱并不意味着“你成为一个完美的人，或是你成为我期望你成为的那种人时，我才爱你。”

At the same time, my love for you isn\'t dependent on whether you fulfill my expectations of you. Authentic love does not imply \"I\'ll love you when you become perfect Ｏr when you become what I expect you to become.\"

6．真爱的付出是不带条件的，爱的特性之一就是无条件。

Authentic love isn\'t given with strings attached. There is an unconditional quality about love.

7. 爱意味着尊重我所爱的人的人格尊严。如果我爱你，我就会把你看成是一个独立的人，你有你自己的价值观，有你自己的思想和感情，我不会要你放弃你的特性，而为了我把自己塑造成我期望你成为的那种人。

Love means having respect for the dignity of the person I love. If I love you, I can see you as a separate person, with your own values Ａnd thoughts Ａnd feelings, Ａnd I do not insist that you surrender your identity Ａnd conform to an image of what I expect you to be for me.

8．我能够允许并鼓励你独立自主，保持你的特性，这样我就不会把你当作一件东西来对待，不会让你把主要精力用来满足我自己的需要。

I can allow Ａnd encourage you to stand alone Ａnd to be who you are, Ａnd I avoid treating you as an object Ｏr using you primarily to gratify my own needs.

9．爱意味着对我所爱的人作出一种承诺。这种承诺并不需要我们相互放弃自身的特性，也不表示我们的这种关系一定是永久的关系。这种承诺既包含愿意在痛苦时刻，在犹豫时刻，在斗争时刻和绝望时刻相互支持，也包含共享平静和欢乐的时刻。

Love means making a commitment to the person I love. This commitment doesn\'t entail surrendering our total selves to each other; nor does it imply that the relationship is necessarily permanent. It does entail a willingness to stay with each other in times of pain, uncertainty, struggle, Ａnd despair, as well as in times of calm Ａnd enjoyment.

10．爱就是要感到能够理解自己所爱的人。如果我爱你，我就能与你有同样的情感，我就能通过你的眼睛去看世界。我能够理解你，是因为我在你身上看到了我自己，而在我身上我也看到了你。

Love means identifying with the person I love. If I love you, I can empathize with you Ａnd see the world through your eyes. I can identify with you because I\'m able to see myself in you Ａnd you in me.

11．这种亲密的关系并不是说要持续地“在一起，”因为距离和分别对于相爱来说有时是必要的。距离可以增强爱的联系，距离还有助于重新发现自己，这样我们就能够以新的方式面对对方。

This closeness does not imply a continual \"togetherness,\" for distance Ａnd separation are sometimes essential in a loving relationship. Distance can intensify a loving bond, Ａnd it can help us rediscover ourselves, so that we are able to meet each other in a new way.

12．爱意味着我了解我所爱的人，我知道那个人的方方面面——不仅仅是美好的一面，而且也包括他能力所限，言行不一和有其他缺点的一面。

Love means that I know the person I love. I\'m aware of the many sides of the other person——not just the beautiful side but also the limitations, inconsistencies Ａnd flaws.

13．我知道那个人的思想和情感，我体验到那个人身上某种本质的东西；我能透过对方在社交场合的表现和在社会上所担当的角色，看到他更内在的东西。

I have an awareness of the other\'s feelings Ａnd thoughts, Ａnd I experience something of the core of that person. I can penetrate social masks Ａnd roles Ａnd see the other person on a deeper level.

14．爱可以容忍不完美。在爱的关系中，必然有厌烦的时候，有我想放弃的时候，有十分紧张的时候，有我感到没有出路的时候。真正的爱并不意味着永远快乐。

Love can tolerate imperfection. In a love relationship there are times of boredom, times when I may feel like giving up, times of real strain, Ａnd times I experience an impasse. Authentic love does not imply enduring happiness.

15．我之所以能够在困难时期和你在一起，是因为我记得我们过去共同度过的时光，是因为我能想象，如果我们对问题予以足够的重视，并因此能够面对问题而且能度过这个时期，我们将来在一起的日子会是什么样子。

I can stay during rough times, however, because I can remember what we had together in the past, Ａnd I can picture what we will have together in our future if we care enough to face our problems Ａnd work them through.

16．爱意味着我需要所爱的人，但不是缺了他就不行。如果没有你我就不能生存，那我根本就不能无拘无束地去爱你。

Love means having a want for the person I love without having a need for that person in order to be complete. If I am nothing without you, then I\'m not really free to love you.

17. 我爱你，你离开了，我有失落感，我难过，我感到孤独，但我还能支撑下去。

I love you Ａnd you leave, I\'ll experience a loss Ａnd be sad Ａnd lonely, but I\'ll still be able to survive.

18．如果我的价值和我的生存过于依赖于你，那我就没有审视我们之间关系的自由，我就没有反驳你的自由，我也没有与你当面进行争辩的自由。由于我怕失去你，我就只好降低要求，而这种委曲求全肯定会引起我的不满情绪。

If I am overly dependent on you for my meaning Ａnd my survival, then I am not free to challenge our relationship; nor am I free to challenge Ａnd confront you. Because of my fear of losing you, I\'ll settle for less than I want, Ａnd this settling will surely lead to feelings of resentment.

 

19．如果我们相互信任，我们就愿意相互敞开我们的心扉，我们就能够去掉假面具，去掉伪装，显示我们的真面貌。

If we trust each other, we are willing to be open to each other Ａnd can shed masks Ａnd pretenses Ａnd reveal our true selves.

20. 爱是广阔的。如果我爱你，我就鼓励你向外发展，建立其他的人际关系。

Love is expansive. If I love you, I encourage you to reach out Ａnd develop other relationships.

21．尽管我们之间的爱以及我们相互承担的责任不允许我们做某些事情，但我们并不是完全彻底地拴在一起。

Although our love for each other Ａnd our commitment to each other might bar certain actions on our parts, we are not totally Ａnd exclusively wedded to each other.

22．把一个人和另一个人捆绑在一起，而不给他发展的空间，这是一种虚假的爱。

It is a pseudolove that cements one person to another in such a way that he Ｏr she is not given room to grow.

23. 爱中充满了自我。我只有能真正地爱自己，珍视自己，欣赏自己，尊重自己，我才能爱你。

Love is selfish. I can only love you if I genuinely love, value, appreciate, Ａnd respect myself.

24．如果我空虚，那么我能给你的只有空虚。如果我感到我自己是完整的、有价值的人，那么我就能够让你分享我的充实。

If I am empty, then all I can give you is my emptiness. If I feel that I\'m complete Ａnd worthwhile in myself, then I\'m able to give to you out of my fullness.

25．给予你我对你的爱，最好的一个方式就是和你一起充分享受我的一切。

One of the best ways for me to give you love is by fully enjoying myself with you.

26．成熟的爱是两个人的结合，但又不失各自的完整和特性。

Mature love is Ｕnion under the condition of preserving one\'s integrity, one\'s individuality.

27．爱中有这种矛盾现象：合二为一，却又一分为二。

In love this paradox occurs that two beings become one Ａnd yet remain two.

28. 我们在婚姻中最想得到的是什么？爱与被爱，幸福与安全，成长与发现。

What is it we want most from a marriage? To love Ａnd be loved. To be happy Ａnd secure. To grow, to discover.

29．爱的关系是一个花园，我们在其中种植、培育和收获最珍贵的作物——我们自己，我们的配偶在这个花园里得到同样肥沃的土壤可以蓬勃发展。

A love relationship is the garden in which we plant, cultivate Ａnd harvest the most precious of crops, our own self, Ａnd in which our spouse is provided with the same rich soil in which to bloom.

30. 只有当我们的配偶也心愿得偿时，我们才可能心愿得偿。

We cannot obtain what we want unless our partner also gets what he Ｏr she wants.

31．例如：一位妇女可能想去听交响乐而她的丈夫则痛恨交响乐。

A woman may, for instance, want to go to the symphony. Her husband might hate symphonies.

32．但是，花几个小时听他不喜欢的音乐，他可以给自己的伴侣带来快乐。为得到这份快乐所付出的代价并不高。对吧？

But by spending a few hours listening to music he doesn’t care for, he can bring joy to his partner. That’s a pretty cheap price to pay for joy, isn’t it?

33．现代心理学家们对“双赢”解决办法很感兴趣，但在婚姻中，成功更取决于“双输”解决办法。

Modern psychologists are taken with the “win-win” solution. But in marriage, success resides more in “lose-lose” solutions.

34．有了这些解决方案，双方就都能获胜。因为在爱的关系中，输是送出一份总会有回报的礼物。

Out of these, both parties can win. For in the love configuration, losing gives a gift that always returns.

35．婚姻关系中人们争论最多的问题——如钱该怎么花——经常并不是真正的问题。关键的问题是：谁将掌握控制权？

The issues that people argue over most in marriage, such as how to spend money, often aren’t the real ones. The key issue is: who is going to be in control?

36．年轻一些的时候，我对控制权的需要源于害怕，缺乏信任和没有安全感。最后我终于意识到我不需要控制我的妻子——实际上我不应该控制她，我也不可能控制她，如果我试图控制她，我会毁了我们的婚姻。

When I was younger, my need to control arose out of fear, a lack of trust, insecurity. Finally I realized I didn’t need to control my wife—that, indeed, I ought not control her, that I couldn’t control her, Ａnd that if I tried to, I would destroy our marriage.

37．放弃控制权经常被与软弱混为一谈。但是家庭之争中的胜利者从来都不是真正的胜利者。在你赢得斗争而你的伴侣屈服时，你已经输了。

Giving up control is often confused with weakness. But the winner in a domestic argument is never really the winner. When you win a battle Ａnd your partner submits, you have, paradoxically, lost.

1) I love you not because of who you are, but because of who I am when I am with you.
　　我爱你，不是因为你是一个怎样的人，而是因为我喜欢与你在一起时的感觉。
　　
　　2) No man Ｏr woman is worth your tears, Ａnd the one who is, won‘t make you cry.
　　没有人值得你流泪，值得让你这么做的人不会让你哭泣。
　　
　　3) The worst way to miss someone is to be sitting right beside them knowing you can‘t have them.
　　失去某人，最糟糕的莫过于，他近在身旁，却犹如远在天边。
　　
　　4) Never frown, even when you are sad, because you never know who is falling in love with your smile.
　　纵然伤心，也不要愁眉不展，因为你不知是谁会爱上你的笑容。
　　
　　5) To the world you may be one person, but to one person you may be the world.
　　对于世界而言，你是一个人；但是对于某个人，你是他的整个世界。
　　
　　6) Don‘t waste your time on a man/woman, who isn‘t willing to waste their time on you.
　　不要为那些不愿在你身上花费时间的人而浪费你的时间。
　　
　　7) Just because someone doesn‘t love you the way you want them to, doesn‘t mean they don‘t love you with all they have.
　　爱你的人如果没有按你所希望的方式来爱你，那并不代表他们没有全心全意地爱你。
　　
　　8) Don‘t try so hard, the best things come when you least expect them to.
　　不要着急，最好的总会在最不经意的时候出现。
　　
　　9) Maybe God wants us to meet a few wrong people before meeting the right one, so that when we finally meet the person, we will know how to be grateful.
　　在遇到梦中人之前，上天也许会安排我们先遇到别的人；在我们终于遇见心仪的人时，便应当心存感激。
　　
　　10) Don‘t cry because it is over, smile because it happened.
不要因为结束而哭泣，微笑吧，为你的曾经拥有
Life is like a box of chocolates, Forrest. You never know what you\'re gonna get

 

When you meet and fall in love with the person of your dreams, the two of you experience many wonderful "first times". The world around you is renewed and infused with a special kind of happiness that can only be understood by hearts in love. You celebrate every new sunrise, make promises, and dream about a future spent together... forever.
　　当有一天你遇到了你的梦中情人，你们将共同经历许多美妙的“第一次”。你们将被幸福包围着，那种甜蜜的感觉只有相爱的人才能体会。你们会为每天的日出而喝彩，彼此许下诺言，梦想着未来，相守一生……

This beautiful collection of contemporary poetry will evoke memories of when your relationship began — and remind you of all the reasons you're still so much in love today. It's the perfect book to share with the one you love: a lovely and lasting way to remind someone special that you mean it with all your heart whenever you say...
　　这本珍藏的小诗集将唤醒你最深的记忆，让你想起深爱一个人的缘由。这本小册子适合和你深爱的人一起分享：和他/她一起回忆你们的点点滴滴，无论何时你说起那句……

" I keep falling in love with you."
　　“我一直爱你。”