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  • To Read When You’re Alone

    2008-10-08

    To Read When You're Alone

    By Mike Staver


         I was 13 years old.  My family had moved to Southern California from North Florida a year before.  I hit adolescence with a vengeance.  I was angry and rebellious, with little regard for anything my parents had to say, particularly if it had to do with me.  Like so many teenagers, I struggled to escape from anything that didn't agree with my picture of the world.  A "brilliant without need of guidance" kid, I rejected any overt offering of love.  In fact, I got angry at the mention of the word love.
         One night, after a particularly difficult day, I stormed into my room, shut the door and got into bed.  As I lay down in the privacy of my bed, my hands slipped under my pillow.  There was an envelope.  I pulled it out and on the envelope it said, "To read when you're alone."
         Since I was alone, no one would know whether I read it or not, so I opened it.  It said "Mike, I know life is hard right now, I know you are frustrated and I know we don't do everything right.  I also know that I love you completely and nothing you do or say will ever change that.  I am here for you if you ever need to talk, and if you don't, that's okay.  Just know that no matter where you go or what you do in your life, I will always love you and be proud that you are my son.  I'm here for you and I love you - that will never change.  Love, Mom.
         That was the first of several "To read when you're alone" letters.  They were never mentioned until I was an adult.
         Today I travel the world helping people.  I was in Sarasota, Florida, teaching a seminar when, at the end of the day, a lady came up to me and shared the difficulty she was having with her son.  We walked out to the beach, and I told her of my mom's undying love and about the "To read when you're alone" letters.  Several weeks later, I got a card that said she had written her first letter and left it for her son.
         That night as I went to bed, I put my hands under my pillow and remembered the relief I felt every time I got a letter.  In the midst of my turbulent teen years, the letters were the calm assurance that I could be loved in spite of me, not because of me.  Just before I fell asleep I thanked God that my mom knew what I, an angry teenager, needed.  Today when the seas of life get stormy, I know that just under my pillow there is that calm assurance that love - consistent, abiding, unconditional love - changes lives. 
    　那一年，我13岁。我们家刚从北佛罗里达搬到南加利福尼亚。那时候，我是以一种报复的心理对待青春期的。我的性格很暴躁很反叛，对父母所说的每一件事都持一种逆反的态度，一点也不尊重他们，尤其是当我不得不照他们的意思去做的时候。像其他许多十几岁的青少年一样，我挣扎着奋斗着，极力摆脱那些与我理想中的世界有冲突的事情。我认为自己是个“无需指点的才华横溢的才子”，拒绝任何爱的关怀。实际上，我对即使是只提到“爱”这个字也感到很愤怒。
    　　一天晚上，在经历了一个特别难熬的白天之后，我怒气冲冲地跑回房间，狠狠地摔上房门，倒在床上。当我的手指滑到枕头下面，那儿有一个信封。我把它拉出来，看到信封上写着，“当你孤独的时候，读一读它”。
    　　既然我是独自一人，那么反正不会有人知道我是否读过它，于是我就打开它。只见上面写着，“迈克，我知道你的生活现在很艰难，我知道你很失落，我知道我们做的事都不合你的心意。我也知道我全心全意地爱你，不管你做什么或者说什么，都不会改变这一点。如果你需要和人交谈，我会随时奉陪；如果你不想，也没关系。我只是希望你能知道，不管你去哪里，不管你做什么，在你的一生中，我永远爱你，永远以你是我的儿子感到骄傲。我会永远站在你的背后支持你，我会永远爱你，这一点永远不会改变。爱你的，妈妈”。
    　　那是“当你孤独的时候读一读”的信中的第一封。在我成年之前，他们从没有在我面前提起过这些信。
    　　成年后，我曾经在佛罗里达州的萨拉索塔主持过一个课堂讨论会。那天快结束的时候，一位女士走到我身边，把她和儿子之间的隔阂告诉了我。我们一块来到沙滩上，我把我妈妈及她那些“当你孤独的时候读一读”的信的事情告诉了她。几个星期后，我收到她寄来的一张卡片，上面说她已经给儿子写了第一封信，儿子很感动。
    　　那天晚上，当我上床睡觉的时候，我把手伸到我的枕头底下，回忆以前每次摸到信的时候感到的安慰。
    　　在我十七八岁的时候，我知道我之所以被爱不是因为我杰出，而是因为我是妈妈的儿子！那些信就是最可靠的保证。在我入睡之前，我为我的妈妈知道什么是我——一个十几岁的、叛逆的孩子所需要的理解而心存感激。
    　　不论生命之海遭遇什么样的风暴，我知道我的枕头底下有世上最坚固、最持久、最无条件的爱，这是我改变命运的可靠保证。

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  • 因为爱过，所以不会成敌人；因为伤过，所以不会做朋友

    2008-8-30

    如果，前世的五百次回眸才换来今生的擦肩而过，那想来已经很幸福了――其实，擦肩而过，也是一种很深的缘分。佛说：五百次的回眸才能换来今生的擦肩而过。可以一秒钟遇到一个人，一分钟认识一个人，一个小时喜欢上一个人，一天时间爱上一个人，但是却要用一辈子去忘记一个人。
    　　当她不爱你的时候，无论过去她是否爱过还是后来忘了，又或者是从未爱过，当你无法再成为她心里的那个人的时候，她的心便不会记得你。请不要在你不开心时去打搅她，她那儿绝对不是你此刻应该的去处。请不要与她讲你的琐事，她无暇更是没有兴趣去了解你、你的生活。即使讲了，她也很快会忘记的。没有爱，你注定挤不进她的生命。请不要在她的面前流眼泪，她无法给予你照顾和关心，至多只是一点同情。只有爱你的人，才会真正的去珍惜你，而不是，旁观的同情和怜悯。
    　　当她不爱你的时候，你的爱便是她的负担。请不要去计算自己的付出，不要希望有什么回报。你用心，她无心，爱着不爱自己的人，本身便是没有回报的。不要计较对与错，这样会快乐些。请不要失去自信，因为爱一个人，并非她的优秀，而只是一种感觉。她让你有这样的感觉，于是你爱她。同样，她不爱你，也并非你不优秀。优秀，不是爱的理由。还有那么多爱自己的人，淡淡地微笑一下，也是异样甜美的。
    　　当她不爱你的时候，也一定要祝福她。有了爱，便不该有恨，因为曾经有爱，有爱的日子里是快乐的，有缘在一起也是快乐，有过快乐有过爱，就不会再有恨。她失去的是一个爱她的人，而你失去了一个不爱你的人，却得到了一个重新生活、重新去爱的机会。请你深深呼吸，一生的路上，铺满了爱的花蕾，总有那么一朵属于你，花儿虽多，却没有重复的一朵，这是生生世世早已经注定的。
    　　当她不爱你的时候，就是你从他生活中消失的时候，第一时间离开她，骄傲地过属于自己的生活。同时，你也希望她能幸福快乐，找到属于她的未来。轻轻拥抱一下回忆里的温暖，轻柔地凝视凋谢的温柔。无论结果怎样都会破坏了曾经的美感。干干净净地离开，也许若干年后的某个午后，阳光下的她眯起双眼会记起某个美好的瞬间，会心一笑。种种怀念，值了。
    　　爱不一定要永远。曾经拥有的也许会是你一生最美好的回忆。因为爱过，所以不会成敌人；因为伤过，所以不会做朋友；只能是最熟悉的陌生人。爱过知情重，醉过知酒浓。关于爱的记忆，应该好好收藏，只是今后的幸福，要各自去寻找。
    　　爱是一种感觉，不爱也是一种感觉，而往往难以抉择的是心中的感觉到底是爱还是不爱。原来握在手里的，不一定就是你们真正拥有的；你们所拥有的，也不一定就是你们真正铭刻在心的。人生很多时候需要自觉的放弃，因为拥有的时候，你们也许正在失去，而放弃的时候，你们也许又在重新获得。
    　　明白的人懂得放弃，真情的人懂得牺牲，幸福的人懂得超脱。对不爱自己的人，最需要的是理解、放弃和祝福。过多的自作多情是在乞求对方的施舍。爱与被爱，都是让人幸福的事情。不要让这些变成痛苦。既然你们已经经历了，多年以后，偶尔想起，希望都是美好的回忆。活的自信些，开心些，把最美的微笑留给伤你最深的人，聪明的人知道自己要快乐。

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  • 10 Ways We Hurt Our Romantic Relationships

    2008-8-26

     转载：

    It’s not easy to have a great relationship with your boy/girlfriend, partner, or spouse. But it’s not impossible, either — it takes some work, of course, but it’s work, work that’s a joy when everything comes together.

    A lot of times, though, the work isn’t enough. We get in our own way with ideas and attitudes about relationships that are not only wrong, but often work to undermine our relationships no matter how hard we work at it.

    I’ve watched a lot of breakups (some of them my own). I’ve seen dramatic flare-ups and drawn-out slow fades, and I’ve tried to pay attention to what seems to be going on. Here are a few of the things I’ve seen that cause people to destroy their own relationships.

    1. You’re playing to win

    One of the deadliest killers of relationships is the competitive urge. I don’t mean competition in the sense that you can’t stand to lose at tennis, I mean the attitude that the relationship itself is a kind of game that you’re tying to win. People in competitive relationships are always looking for an advantage, the upper hand, some edge they can hold over their partner’s head. If you feel that there are things you can’t tell your partner because she or he will use it against you, you’re in a competitive relationship — but not for long.

    2. You don’t trust

    There are two aspects of trust that are important in relationships. One is trusting your partner enough to know that s/he won’t cheat on you or otherwise hurt you — and to know that he or she trusts you that way, too. The other is trusting them enough to know they won’t leave you or stop loving you no matter what you do or say. The second that level of trust is gone, whether because one of you takes advantage of that trust and does something horrible or because one of you thinks the other has, the relationship is over — even if it takes 10 more years for you to break up.

    3. You don’t talk

    Too many people hold their tongues about things that bother or upset them in their relationship, either because they don’t want to hurt their partner, or because they’re trying to win. (See #1 above; example: “If you don’t know why I’m mad, I’m certainly not going to tell you!”) While this might make things easier in the short term, in the long run it gradually erodes the foundation of the relationship away. Little issues grow into bigger and bigger problems — problems that don’t get fixed because your partner is blissfully unaware, or worse, is totally aware of them but thinks they don’t really bother you. Ultimately, keeping quiet reflects a lack of trust — and, as I said that’s the death of a relationship.

    4. You don’t listen

    Listening — really listening — is hard. It’s normal to want to defend ourselves when we hear something that seems like criticism, so instead of really hearing someone out, we interrupt to explain or excuse ourselves, or we turn inward to prepare our defense. But your partner deserves your active listening. S/he even deserves you to hear the between-the-lines content of daily chit-chat, to suss out his/her dreams and desires when even s/he doesn’t even know exactly what they are. If you can’t listen that way, at least to the person you love, there’s a problem.

    5. You spend like a single person

    This was a hard lesson for me to learn — until it broke up a 7-year relationship. When you’re single, you can buy whatever you want, whenever you want, with little regard for the future. It’s not necessarily wise, but you’re the only one who has to pay the consequences. When you are with someone in a long-term relationship, that is no longer a possibility. Your partner — and your children, if there are or will be any — will have to bear the brunt of your spending, so you’d better get in the habit of taking care of household necessities first and then, if there’s anything left over, of discussing with your partner the best way to use it.

    This is an increasing problem these days, because more and more people are opting to keep their finances separate, even when they’re married. There’s nothing wrong with that kind of arrangement in and of itself, but it demands more communication and involvement between the partners, not less. If you’re spending money as if it was your money and nobody else has a right to tell you what to do with it, your relationship is doomed.

    6. You’re afraid of breaking up

    Nobody in a truly happy partnership is afraid of breaking up. If you are, that’s a big warning sign that something’s wrong. But often, what’s wrong is the fear itself. Not only does it betray a lack of trust, but it shows a lack of self-confidence and self-esteem — you’re afraid that there’s no good reason for someone to want to be with you, and that sooner or later your partner will “wise up” and take off. So you pour more energy into keeping up the appearance of a happy relationships than you do into building yourself up as a person. Quite frankly, this isn’t going to be very satisfying for you, and it also isn’t going to be very satisfying for your partner.

    7. You’re dependent

    There’s a thin line between companionship and support and dependency. If you depend on your partner — that is, if you absolutely cannot live without her or him — you’ve crossed that line. The pressure is now on your partner to fill whatever’s missing in you — a pressure s/he will learn to resent. If you expect your partner to bring everything while you bring nothing to your relationship — and I’m talking finances as well as emotional support, here — you’re in trouble. (Note: I’m not saying that you need to contribute equally to household finances — what I’m saying is that if you’re not contributing to the household budget, and you’re not contributing anywhere else, things are out of whack and that’s never good.)

    8. You expect Happiness

    A sign of a bad relationship is that one or both partners expect either to make the other happy or for their partner to make them happy. This is not only an unrealistic expectation to lay on yourself or on them — nobody can “make” you happy, except you — but it’s an unrealistic expectation to lay on your relationship. Relationships aren’t only about being happy, and there’s lots of times when you won’t and even shouldn’t be. Being able to rely on someone even when you’re upset, miserable, depressed, or grieving is a lot more important than being happy all the time. If you expect your partner to make you happy — or worse, you’re frustrated because you aren’t able to make your partner happy — your relationship isn’t going to fare well when it hits a rough spot.

    9. You never fight

    A good argument is essential, every now and then. In part, arguing helps bring out the little stuff before it becomes major, but also, fighting expresses anger which is a perfectly normal part of a human’s emotional make-up. Your relationship has to be strong enough to hold all of who you are, not just the sunny stuff.

    One reason couples don’t fight is that they fear conflict — which reflects a lack of trust and a foundation of fear. That’s bad. Another reason couples avoid arguments is that they’ve learned that anger is unreasonable and unproductive. They’ve learned that arguing represents a breakdown rather than a natural part of a relationship’s development. While an argument isn’t pleasant, it can help both partners to articulate issues they may not have even known they had — and help keep them from simmering until you cross a line you can’t come back from.

    10. You expect it to be easy/you expect it to be hard中国英语博客基地(English Blogs-英语麦当劳博客空间):]6lT(Hw,G!H"Tl6V;k+Z
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    There are two deeply problematic attitudes about relationships I hear often. One is that a relationship should be easy, that if you really love each other and are meant to be together, it will work itself out. The other is that anything worth having is going to be hard — and that therefore if it’s hard, it must be worth having.

    The outcome of both views is that you don’t work at your relationship. You don’t work because it’s supposed to be easy and therefore not need any work, or you don’t work because it’s supposed to be hard and it wouldn’t be hard if you worked at it. In both cases, you quickly get burnt out — either because the problems you’re ignoring really don’t go away just because you think they should. or because the problems you’re cultivating are a constant drag on your energy. A relationship that’s too much work might be suffering from one of the attitudes above, but a relationship that doesn’t seem to need any work isn’t any better.

    Your choices

    There isn’t any one answer to any of the problems above. There are choices though: you can either seek out an answer, something that addresses why you are hurting your relationship, or you can resign yourself to the failure of your relationship (and maybe the next one, and the next one, and…). Failure doesn’t always mean you break up — many people aren’t that lucky. But people can live quite unhappily in failed relationships for years and even decades because they’re afraid they won’t find anything better, or worse, they’re afraid they deserve it. Don’t you be one of them — if you suffer from any of these problems, figure out how to fix it, whether that means therapy, a solo mountain retreat, or just talking to your partner and committing yourselves to change.

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  • The Importance of Being Honest

    2008-6-01

    In the busy city of New York, such an astonishing thing that ever happened.
    　　在繁华的纽约，曾经发生了这样一件震撼人心的事情。

    On a Friday night, a poor young artist stood at the gate of the subway station, playing his violin. Though the music was great, people were quickly going home for the weekend. In this case, many of them slowed down their paces and put some money into the hat of the young man.
    　　星期五的傍晚，一个贫穷的年轻艺人仍然像往常一样站在地铁站门口，专心致志地拉着他的小提琴。琴声优美动听，虽然人们都急急忙忙地赶着回家过周末，但还是有很多人情不自禁的放慢了脚步，时不时地会有一些人在年轻艺人跟前的礼帽里放一些钱。

    The next day, the young artist came to the gate of the subway station, and put his hat on the ground gracefully. Different than the day before, he took out a large piece of paper and laid it on the ground and put some stones on it. Then he adjusted the violin and began playing. It seemed more pleasant to listen to.
    　　第二天黄昏，年轻的艺人又像往常一样准时来到地铁门口，把他的礼帽摘下来很优雅地放在地上。和以往不同的是，他还从包里拿出一张大纸，然后很认真地铺在地上，四周还用自备的小石块压上。做完这一切以后，他调试好小提琴，又开始了演奏，声音似乎比以前更动听更悠扬。

    Before long, the young violinist was surrounded with people, who were all attracted by the words on that paper. It said, "Last night, a gentleman named George Sang put an important thing into my hat by mistaken. Please come to claim it soon."
    　　不久，年轻的小提琴手周围站满了人，人们都被铺在地上的那张大纸上的字吸引了，有的人还踮起脚尖看。上面写着：“昨天傍晚，有一位叫乔治-桑的先生错将一份很重要的东西放在我的礼帽里，请您速来认领。”

    Seeing this, it caused a great excitement and people wondered what it could be. After about half an hour, a middle-aged man ran there in a hurry and rushed through the crowd to the violinist and grabbed his shoulders and said, "Yes, it's you. You did come here. I knew that you're an honest man and would certainly come here."
    　　见此情景，人群之间引起一阵骚动，都想知道这是一份什么样的东西。过了半小时左右，一位中年男人急急忙忙跑过来，拨开人群就冲到小提琴手面前，抓住他的肩膀语无伦次的说：“啊！是您呀，您真的来了，我就知道您是个诚实的人，您一定会来的。”

    The young violinist asked calmly, "Are you Mr. George Sang?"
    　　年轻的小提琴手冷静地问：“您是乔治-桑先生吗？”

    The man nodded. The violinist asked, "Did you lose something?"
    　　那人连忙点头。小提琴手又问：“您遗落了什么东西吗？”

    "Lottery. It's lottery," said the man.
    　　那位先生说：“奖票，奖票”。

    The violinist took out a lottery ticket on which George Sang's name was seen. "Is it?" he asked.
    　　小提琴手于是掏出一张奖票，上面还醒目地写着乔治-桑，小提琴手举着彩票问：“是这个吗？”

    George nodded promptly and seized the lottery ticket and kissed it, then he danced with the violinist.
    　　乔治-桑迅速地点点头，抢过奖票吻了一下，然后又抱着小提琴手在地上跳起了舞。
    The story turned out to be this: George Sang is an office clerk. He bought a lottery ticket issued by a bank a few days ago. The awards opened yesterday and he won a prize of $500,000. So he felt very happy after work and felt the music was so wonderful, that he took out 50 dollars and put in the hat. However the lottery ticket was also thrown in. The violinist was a student at an Arts College and had planned to attend advanced studies in Vienna. He had booked the ticket and would fly that morning. However when he was cleaning up he found the lottery ticket. Thinking that the owner would return to look for it, he cancelled the flight and came back to where he was given the lottery ticket.
    　　原来事情是这样的，乔治-桑是一家公司的小职员，他前些日子买了一张一家银行发行的奖票，昨天上午开奖，他中了50万美元的奖金。昨天下班，他心情很好，觉得音乐也特别美妙，于是就从钱包里掏出50美元，放在了礼帽里，可是不小心把奖票也扔了进去。小提琴手是一名艺术学院的学生，本来打算去维也纳进修，已经定好了机票，时间就在今天上午，可是他昨天整理东西时发现了这张奖票，想到失主会来找，于是今天就退掉了机票，又准时来到这里。Later someone asked the violinist: "At that time you were in needed to pay the tuition fee and you had to play the violin in the subway station every day to make the money. Then why didn't you take the lottery ticket for yourself?"
    　　后来，有人问小提琴手：“你当时那么需要一笔学费，为了赚够这笔学费，你不得不每天到地铁站拉提琴。那你为什么不把那50万元的奖票留下呢？”

    The violinist said, "Although I don't have much money, I live happily; but if I lose honesty I won't be happy forever."
    　　小提琴手说：“虽然我没钱，但我活得很快乐；假如我没了诚信，我一天也不会快乐。”
    Through our lives, we can gain a lot and lose so much. But being honest should always be with us. If we bear ourselves in a deceptive and dishonest way, we may succeed temporarily. However, from the long-term view, we will be a loser. Such kind of people are just like the water on the mountain. It stands high above the masses at the beginning, but gradually it comes down inch by inch and loses the chance of going up.
    　　在人的一生中，我们会得到许多，也会失去许多，但守信用却应是始终陪伴我们的。如果以虚伪、不诚实的方式为人处世，也许能获得暂时的“成功”，但从长远看，他最终是个失败者。这种人就像山上的水，刚开始的时候，是高高在上，但逐渐逐渐地它就越来越下降，再没有一个上升的机会。

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  • Time is like a river！（转）

    2008-6-01

    Never explain yourself to any one.Because the person who likes you doesn`t need it, and the person who dislikes you won`t believe you.
    永远不要向任何人解释你自己,因为喜欢你的人不需要, 而不喜欢你的人不会相信.
    Don`t let someone become a priority in your life,when you are just an option in their life.....Relationships work best when they are balanced.
    别让某人成为你生命中的优先, 而你只是他们生命中的一个选择. 人与人之间的关系只在彼此达到平衡时, 运作的最恰当.
    When we wake up in the morning, we have two simple choices. Go back to sleep and dream, or wake up and chase those dreams. Choice is yours....
    每天早上醒来时, 我们可以有两上简单的选择: 回头去睡,继续做梦, 或者起身去追逐梦想. 选择权在你手上!
    We make them cry who care for us. We cry for those who never care for us. And we care for those who will never cry for us.This is the truth of life. It`s strange but true. Once you realise this, it`s never too late to change.
    我们总让在乎我们的人为自己哭泣,并总为那些永远不会在乎我们的人哭泣,且我们在意那些永远不会为我们哭泣的人.这是存在于生命中的事实,奇怪但却真实. 一旦你了解, 改变永远不会太迟.
    Don`t make promise when you are in joy. Don`t reply when you are sad. Don`t take decision when you are angry. Think twice, act advisably.
    别在喜悦时许下承诺, 别在忧伤时做出回答, 别在愤怒时下决定, 三思而后行,做出睿智的行为.
    Time is like a river, you can`t touch the same water twice.Because the flow that has passed will never pass again. Enjoy every moment of life.
    时间就像流水, 你永远无法触碰同样的水两次. 因为已经流逝的永远不会再来, 享受生命中的每一个当下.
    When you keep saying you are busy, then you are never free. When you keep saying you have no time, then you will ever have time. When you keep saying that you will do it tomorrow, then your tomorrow will never come.
    当你持续的说你非常忙碌, 就永远不会得到空闲; 当你持续的说你没有时间, 就永远不会有时间; 当你持续的说这件事你明天再做, 你的"明天"就永远不会来(就永远不会去做).

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  • A goodbye kiss

    2008-5-31

    The Board Meeting had come to an end. Bob started to stand up and jostled the table, spilling his coffee over his notes. "How embarrassing.I am getting so clumsy in my old age."

    Everyone had a good laugh, and soon we were all telling stories of our most embarrassing moments. It came around to Frank who sat quietly listening to the others. Someone said, "Come on, Frank. Tell us your most embarrassing moment."

    Frank laughed and began to tell us of his childhood. "I grew up in San Pedro. My Dad was a fisherman, and he loved the sea. He had his own boat, but it was hard making a living on the sea.He worked hard and would stay out until he caught enough to feed the family. Not just enough for our family, but also for his Mom and Dad and the other kids that were still at home."

    He looked at us and said, "I wish you could have met my Dad. He was a big man, and he was strong from pulling the nets and fighting the seas for his catch. When you got close to him, he smelled like the ocean. He would wear his old canvas, foul-weather coat and his bibbed overalls. His rain hat would be pulled down over his brow. No matter how much my Mother washed them, they would still smell of the sea and of fish."

    Frank's voice dropped a bit. "When the weather was bad he would drive me to school. He had this old truck that he used in his fishing business. That truck was older than he was. It would wheeze and rattle down the road. You could hear it coming for blocks. As he would drive toward the school,I would shrink down into the seat hoping to disappear. Half the time, he would slam to a stop and the old truck would belch a cloud of smoke. He would pull right up in front, and it seemed like everybody would be standing around and watching. Then he would lean over and give me a big kiss on the cheek and tell me to be a good boy. It was so embarrassing for me. Here, I was twelve years old, and my Dad would lean over and kiss me goodbye!"

    He paused and then went on, "I remember the day I decided I was too old for a goodbye kiss. When we got to the school and came to a stop, he had his usual big smile. He started to lean toward me, but I put my hand up and said, 'No, Dad.'

    It was the first time I had ever talked to him that way, and he had this surprised look on his face.

    I said, 'Dad, I'm too old for a goodbye kiss. I'm too old for any kind of kiss.'

    My Dad looked at me for the longest time, and his eyes started to tear up. I had never seen him cry. He turned and looked out the windshield. 'You're right,' he said. 'You are a big boy....a man. I won't kiss you anymore.'"

    Frank got a funny look on his face, and the tears began to well up in his eyes, as he spoke. "It wasn't long after that when my Dad went to sea and never came back. It was a day when most of the fleet stayed in, but not Dad. He had a big family to feed. They found his boat adrift with its nets half in and half out. He must have gotten into a gale and was trying to save the nets and the floats."

    I looked at Frank and saw that tears were running down his cheeks. Frank spoke again. "Guys, you don't know what I would give to have my Dad give me just one more kiss on the cheek....to feel his rough old face....to smell the ocean on him....to feel his arm around my neck. I wish I had been a man then. If I had been a man, I would never have told my Dad I was too old for a goodbye kiss."

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  • Today,I Choose...

    2008-5-27

    It's quiet. It's early.

    The sky is still black. The world is still asleep.

    In a few moments the day will arrive. It will roar down the track with the rising of the sun. The stillness of the dawn will be exchanged for the noise of the day. The calm of solitude will be replaced by the pounding pace of the human race.
    The     refuge of the early morning will be invaded by decisions to be made and deadlines to be met.

    For the next twelve hours I will be exposed to the day's demands. It is now that I must make a choice. I'm free to choose, and so I choose...

    I choose love ..
    No occasion justifies     hatred    ;
    No     injustice warrants bitterness.

    I choose joy ...
    I will refuse the temptation to be     cynical... the tool of the lazy thinker.

    I choose peace ...
    I will live forgiven.
    I will forgive so that I may live.

    I choose patience ...
    I will overlook the inconveniences of the world.
    Instead of clenching my fist at new assignments,
    I will face them with joy and courage.

    I choose gentleness ..
    Nothing is won by force.
    I choose to be gentle.

    You're listening to Faith Radio Online-Simply to Relax,
    I'm Faith. Love, joy, peace, patience and gentleness,
    to these I commit my day.

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  • Happy mother's day

    2008-5-11

    Today is Mother's day,may all mothers have good health and happy everyday.

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  • Mama

    2008-5-05

                                Mama
                                            Spice girls

    She used to be my only enemy and never let me be free
    Catching me in places that i knew i shouldn't be
    Every other day i crossed the line
    I didn't mean to be so bad
    I never thought you would become the friend i never had
    Back then i didn't know why why you were misunderstood
    So now i see through your eyes all that you did was love
    Mama I love you   Mama I care
    Mama I Love you   Mama my friend
    You're my friend

    I didn't want to hear it then but i'm not ashamed to say it now
    Every little thing you said and did was right for me
    I had a lot of time to think about about the way i used to be
    Never had a sense of my responsibility
    Back then i didn't know why why you were misunderstood
    So now i see through your eyes all that you did was love
    Mama I love you   Mama I care
    Mama I Love you   Mama my friend
    You're my friend  You're my friend

    But now i'm sure i know why why you were misunderstood
    So now i see through your eyes all i can give you is love
    Mama I love you   Mama I care
    Mama I Love you   Mama my friend

    [repeat ×2]
    You're my friend
    You're my friend
    I'm loving you  you loving me
    Our love that true and guaranteed

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  • what shoud i do?

    2008-5-02

    I have worked in current company for almost 3 years, Honestly, I love this job and work hard. Fortunately, my boss and my manager treat me well, they all helped me a lot and told me many skills about how to do things better. But now I find that I have no enthusiasm on my job. One reason is maybe I know well about this company now. Another is since I lose my last love 4 months ago, I still can’t get over it. I am about to burst into tears at lonely moment and I don’t even know why, I feel like I am wandering through life without purpose everyday. I always think that I am a loser, and want to get away from this unhappy place. So I don’t concentrate my energy on my job.My manager always tell us,the good mood is important to work and live. I also remind myself, something must change, but you know,it is easier said than done,in fact it is so hard to make some change.I really don't want live like this, What should I do?help me,God!

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