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美国50个州的爆笑座右铭(图)
2008-06-18 09:45:35
美国50个州的爆笑座右铭Alabama: Yes, We Have Electricity
阿拉巴马州：是的，我们有电!
Alaska: 11,623 Eskimos Can't Be Wrong!
阿拉斯加州：一万一千六百二十三名爱斯基摩人是不会错的!
Arizona: But It's A Dry Heat
亚利桑那州：可是，这里的热是燥热呀!
Arkansas: Literacy Ain't Everything
阿肯色州：有文化并不能代表一切! California: By 30, Our Women Have More Plastic Than Your Honda
加利福尼亚州：到30岁的时候，我们的妇女使用的整形塑胶的数量将会超过本田公司塑料用量的总和。 Colorado: If You Don't Ski, Don't Bother
科索拉多州：如果你连滑雪都不会，那么请别来打扰我好吗? Connecticut: Like Massachusetts, Only The Kennedy's Don't Own It Yet
康涅狄格州：和马萨诸塞州几乎没什么区别，只是肯尼迪家族还没有拥有它。
Delaware: We Really Do Like The ChemicalsIn Our Water
特拉华州：我们真得很喜欢我们的水源中携带的化学物质。 时尚英语-美式生活
Florida: Ask Us About Our Grandkids
佛罗里达州：问问关于我们的孙子孙女的事情吧。
Georgia: We Put The "Fun" In Fundamentalist Extremism
乔治亚州：我们给极端的正统基督教信仰注入了一些“有趣的东西”。
Hawaii: Haka Tiki Mou Sha'ami Leeki Toru (Death To Mainland Scum, But Leave Your Money)
夏威夷州：让美国大陆上的那些无用之辈去死吧，不过记得把你们的金钱留下。
Idaho: More Than Just Potatoes... Well Okay, We're Not, But The Potatoes Sure Are Real Good
爱达荷州：这不仅仅是马铃薯的问题......好吧好吧，我们不是这个意思，不过马铃薯绝对是真正的好东西!
Illinois: Please Don't Pronouncethe "S"
伊利诺斯州：拜托，我们州名最后那个字母S不需要发音! Indiana: 2 Billion Years TidalWave Free
印第安纳州：20亿年过去了，潮汐带来的波浪还是那么自由自在!
Iowa: We Do Amazing Things With Corn
爱荷华州：我们能用玉米做惊天动地的大事儿! Kansas: First Of The RectangleStates
堪萨斯州：在所有长方形的州中，我们是一个!
Kentucky: Five Million People; Fifteen Last Names
肯塔基州：我们有500万人口，但所有这些人只有15个姓!
Louisiana: We're Not ALL Drunk Cajun Wackos, But That's Our Tourism Campaign
路易斯安纳州：我们可不全是疯疯癫癫的法国移民后裔，那不过是我们的宣传活动罢了。 Maine: We're Really Cold, But We Have Cheap Lobster
缅因州：我们真得很冷，但我们的龙虾很便宜。
Maryland: If You Can Dream It, We Can TaxIt
马里兰州：只要是你能想到的事情，我们就能对其征税!
Massachusetts: Our Taxes Are Lower Than Sweden's (For Most Tax Brackets)
马萨诸塞州：我们征收的税金可没有瑞典人那么高(对于大多数的税级来说是这样)。
Michigan: First Line Of DefenseFrom The Canadians
密歇根州：如果加拿大人发起进攻，我们将是第一道防线!
Minnesota: 10,000 Lakes... And 10,000,000,000,000 Mosquitoes
明尼苏达州：我们有一万个湖泊......还有10万亿只蚊子!
Mississippi: Come And Feel Better About Your Own State
密西西比州：来吧，对你自己的州感觉好一点儿!
Missouri: Your Federal Flood ReliefTax Dollars At Work
密苏里州：你所缴纳的联邦洪灾救济税款能够排上用场。
Montana: Land Of The Big Sky, The Unabomber, Right-Wing Crazies, And Very Little Else
蒙大纳州：这片土地上到处都是大片的天空、邮寄炸弹的恐怖分子和狂热的右翼分子，除此之外几乎一无所有!
Nebraska: Ask About Our State Motto Contest
内部拉斯加州：问问关于我们州座右铭大赛的事情吧。
Nevada: Hookers and Poker!
内华达州：红灯区里拉客的娼妓，当然还有纸牌游戏! New Hampshire: Go Away And Leave Us Alone
新罕布什尔州：走远点儿，让我们安静会儿! New Jersey: You Want A ##$%##! Motto? I Got Yer ##$%##! Motto Right Here!
新泽西州：你们想要一个很那个的座右铭是吗?好吧，这就是我给你们找的很那个的座右铭!
New Mexico: Lizards Make Excellent Pets
New York: You Have The Right To Remain Silent, You Have The Right To An Attorney...
纽约州：你有权保持沉默，你也有权成为一名律师... North Carolina: Tobacco Is A Vegetable
北卡罗来纳州：难道烟草不是一种蔬菜吗?
North Dakota: We Really Are One Of The 50 States!
北达科他州：我们真得是美国的五十个州之一!
Ohio: At Least We're Not Michigan
俄亥俄州：最起码我们不是密歇根州。
Oklahoma: Like The Play, Only No Singing
俄克拉荷马州：和演出很相似，只是没有歌声!
Oregon: SpottedOwl... It's What's For Dinner
俄勒冈州：斑点猫头鹰...它就是我们的晚饭。
Pennsylvania: Cook With Coal
宾夕法尼亚州：烹饪要用煤做燃料。
Rhode Island: We're Not REALLY An Island
罗得岛州：我们真得不是一个岛屿!
South Carolina: Remember The CivilWar? We Didn't Actually Surrender
南卡罗来纳州：还记得南北战争吗?事实上我们并没有投降!
South Dakota: Closer Than North Dakota
南达科他州：比北达科他州要近一些。
Tennessee: The Educashun State
田纳西州：“教育”之州!
Texas: Si' Hablo Ing'les (Yes, I Speak English)
得克萨斯州：是的，我会说英语。 Utah: Our Jesus Is Better Than Your Jesus
犹他州：我们的耶稣比你们的耶稣更好!
Vermont: Yep
佛蒙特州：是啊!
Virginia: Who Says Government Stiffs And Slackjaw Yokels Don't Mix?
弗吉尼亚州：谁说那些刻板的政府官员不能和懒散的乡下人混为一谈?
Washington: Help! We're Overrun By Nerds And Slackers!
华盛顿州：救命呀!我们这里的蠢货和懒鬼已经泛滥成灾了!
Washington, D.C.: Wanna Be Mayor?
华盛顿特区：嗨，想当市长吗?
West Virginia: One Big Happy Family... Really!
西弗吉尼亚州：一个幸福的大家庭...真得，没骗你!
Wisconsin: Come Cut The Cheese
威斯康星州：来切些奶酪了! Wyoming: Where Men Are Men... and the sheepare scared!
怀俄明州：这里的男人都是男子汉...胆小鬼只有害怕的份儿! -
不能不会的10句影视口语表达
2008-06-18 09:43:00
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郭德纲相声搞怪语录大全
2008-06-04 21:11:42
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一只脚门里一只脚门外
2008-04-07 10:36:47
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宝贝 那个男人到底是谁？
2008-04-07 10:35:12
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幽你一默：你只是为了让我感到嫉妒
2008-03-10 14:09:29
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金庸笔下各大侠独门绝技英语叫法(组图)
2008-03-10 14:08:38
传说中的九阴白骨爪？
这就是苗家刀法？1.九阳神功nine man’s power (九个男子的力量)
2.九阴真经nine woman’story (九个女人的故事)
3.九阴白骨爪nine woman catch a white bone (九个女人抓著一个白骨，老外看了还以为会出现召唤兽呢？) 4.神照经God bless you (神保佑你)
5.胡家刀法 Dr.Hu’sword (胡博士的剑，天哪，咱们的胡兄何时成了博士？) 6.两仪剑法1/2 sword (二分之一的剑，请问是左右1/2还是上下1/2？)
7.一阳指one finger just like a pen is (一只手指像笔一样?)
8.洗髓经wash bone (洗骨头? 谁敢去给别人洗骨头啊) 9.苗家刀法Miao’s sword (苗家的刀，好啦，算你对！)
10.易筋经change your bone (换你的骨头.老兄算你狠)
11.龙象波若功D and E comble togeter (龙和象的混合体?)
12.梯云纵心法elevator jump (电梯跳跃?在天雷的打击下，电梯产生异变，於是电梯有了生命......)
13.轻功水上飘flying skill (飞行技能 ，好简洁！)
14.小无相功an unseen power (一种看不见的力量?原力.....)
15.太玄经all fool’s daliy (全是胡言乱语的日记，还真是玄哪！)
16.胡青牛医书buffulo Hu’s medicine book(水牛胡的医书，原来青牛又叫水牛?)
17.五毒秘传the experience of eat drink f**k bet and smoke(吃干赌喝抽菸的经验，这也太毒了吧)
18.药王神篇king of drag(摇头之王，武侠也有摇头的啊)
19.七伤拳7 hurted organ (被伤害的七个器官，有点道理)
20.吸星**** suck star over china(****全中国的星星，好神啊)
21.天山六阳掌6 men of mountain Sky’s press (天山上的六男子掌法，逐字翻也不是这样的吧)
22.黯然销魂掌Deepblue press(深深忧郁的掌法，对对对，有忧郁症的都使的出来)
23.松风剑法softwind sword(软风剑，这还有点像样)
24.回风落雁剑法comeback sword(喝了再上剑，在拍广告吗?)
25.血刀经blood strike(cs 的场地都用上啦)
26.金刚伏魔圈superman’s cover(超人的保护，老外看了还以为超人会出现呢)转
27.八荒六合唯我独尊功my name is NO.1(我的名字叫第一，无言......)
28.含沙射影shoot you with a machine gun(用机关枪射你，这样对吗??)
29.葵花宝典sunflower Bible/from gentlenan to a lady (太阳花的圣经，可让你从绅士变淑女，欧洲变性者的一大福音阿)
30.打狗棒法guide of dog beating(打狗指南，这...哪里有卖阿)
31.白虹剑rainbow of milk (牛奶彩虹)
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“单身”的好玩称呼(图)
2008-03-10 14:06:07
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上帝 请给我一便士
2008-03-10 14:05:21
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你知道我是干嘛的吗？(图)
2008-02-16 13:03:37
Do You Know My Work？(图：齐永斌)Do You Know My Work？
One night a hotel caught fire，and the people who were staying in it ran out in their night clothes.
一天晚上，一家旅馆失火，住在这家旅馆里的人穿着睡衣就跑了出来。 Two men stood outside and looked at the fire.
两个人站在外面，看着大火。
"Before I came out," said one," I ran into some of the rooms and found a lot of money. People don't think of money when they're afraid. When anyone leaves paper money in a fire，the fire burn sit. So I took all the bills that I could find. No one will be poorer because I took them."
“在我出来之前，”其中一个人说，“我跑进一些房间，找到了一大笔钱。人在恐惧中是不会想到钱的。如果有人把纸币留在火里，火就会把它烧成灰烬。所以我把我所能找到的钞票都拿走了。没有人会因为我拿走它们而变得更穷。” "You don't know my work," said the other.
“你不知道我是干什么的。”另一个人说。
"What is your work？" “你是干什么的？”
"I'm a policeman."
“我是警察。” "Oh！" cried the first man. He thought quickly and said, "And do you know my work?"
“噢！”第一个人喊了一声。他灵机一动，说：“那你知道我是干什么的？”
"No," said the policeman.
“不知道。”警察说。”
I'm a writer. I'm always tellings to ries about things that never happened."
“我是个作家。我总是爱编一些从未发生过的故事。”
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跟妈妈一模一样的女朋友
2008-01-16 09:18:36
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爱烤火的猴子等三则趣闻(组图)
2007-12-22 09:32:00
12月19日，在泰国首都曼谷，几名志愿者戴着有“X”图案的帽子参加竞选活动，以呼吁泰国妇女在本周日即将举行的大选中积极行使选举权。
Thai activists wearing caps with cross signs on them during an election campaign in Bangkok Wednesday, December 19, 2007 to urge women to go to vote at Thailand’s general election, which will be held on Sunday.
12月19日，一名游人在雾中的南京玄武湖边留影。当日，一场浓雾笼罩南京城，江苏省气象台发布了大雾黄色预警信号，提醒机场、高速公路、轮渡码头等加强管理，保障安全。
A woman dances by the Xuanwu Lake during a foggy day in Nanjing, capital of east China's Jiangsu Province, Dec. 19, 2007.
12月19日，在日本爱知县的一个猴子公园，几只短尾猴围在篝火旁取暖。大部分猴子天生怕火，但该公园每年为它们在户外燃起篝火，帮助猴子们抵御寒冷，也让它们克服了对火焰的恐惧。
Yakushima monkeys gather around a bonfire at Japan Monkey Park in In-uyama, Aichi Prefecture, Wednesday, Dec. 19, 2007. It is a seasonal tradition at this park.
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经典中英双语笑话欣赏
2007-12-17 16:16:16
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黑猩猩记数字赛过大学生(图)
2007-12-07 11:48:48
研究：5岁黑猩猩记数字赛过大学生
转载
人类一直相信自己是最具智慧的灵长类动物，但日本科学家的研究发现，在数字记忆力方面，5岁的黑猩猩比大学生都要强！这表明，人类在进化的同时，某一方面的能力可能却在退化。
This photo provided by the Primate Research Institute in Kyoto, Japan, show a chimpanzee named Ayumu as he performs the second stage of a memory test in which he must recall the location on a touch sensitive monitor of numerals that have changed to squares, Dec. 13, 2006, at the Institute in Kyoto.[Agencies]
Think you're smarter than a fifth-grader? How about a 5-year-old chimp? Japanese researchers pitted young chimps against human adults in tests of short-term memory, and overall, the chimps won.
That challenges the belief of many people, including many scientists, that "humans are superior to chimpanzees in all cognitive functions," said researcher Tetsuro Matsuzawa of Kyoto University.
"No one can imagine that chimpanzees - young chimpanzees at the age of 5 - have a better performance in a memory task than humans," he said in a statement.
Matsuzawa, a pioneer in studying the mental abilities of chimps, said even he was surprised. He and colleague Sana Inoue report the results in the journal Current Biology.
One memory test included three 5-year-old chimps who'd been taught the order of Arabic numerals 1 through 9, and a dozen human volunteers.
They saw nine numbers displayed on a computer screen. When they touched the first number, the other eight turned into white squares. The test was to touch all these squares in the order of the numbers that used to be there.
Results showed that the chimps, while no more accurate than the people, could do this faster.
One chimp, Ayumu, did the best. Researchers included him and nine college students in a second test.
This time, five numbers flashed on the screen only briefly before they were replaced by white squares. The challenge, again, was to touch these squares in the proper sequence.
When the numbers were displayed for about seven-tenths of a second, Ayumu and the college students were both able to do this correctly about 80 percent of the time.
But when the numbers were displayed for just four-tenths or two-tenths of a second, the chimp was the champ. The briefer of those times is too short to allow a look around the screen, and in those tests Ayumu still scored about 80 percent, while humans plunged to 40 percent.
That indicates Ayumu was better at taking in the whole pattern of numbers at a glance, the researchers wrote.
"It's amazing what this chimpanzee is able to do," said Elizabeth Lonsdorf, director of the Lester E. Fisher Center for the Study and Conservation of Apes at the Lincoln Park Zoo in Chicago. The center studies the mental abilities of apes, but Lonsdorf didn't participate in the new study.
She admired Ayumu's performance when the numbers flashed only briefly on the screen.
"I just watched the video of that and I can tell you right now, there's no way I can do it," she said. "It's unbelievable. I can't even get the first two (squares)."
What's going on here? Even with six months of training, three students failed to catch up to the three young chimps, Matsuzawa said in an e-mail.
He thinks two factors gave his chimps the edge. For one thing, he believes human ancestors gave up much of this skill over evolutionary time to make room in the brain for gaining language abilities.
The other factor is the youth of Ayumu and his peers. The memory for images that's needed for the tests resembles a skill found in children, but which dissipates with age. In fact, the young chimps performed better than older chimps in the new study.
So the next logical step, Lonsdorf said, is to fix up Ayumu with some real competition on these tests: little kids.
（Agencies）
Vocabulary:
chimpanzee：(非洲)黑猩猩
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谁是“吹毛求疵”的猴子？
2007-12-06 14:31:27
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不吃早餐影响工作效率(图)
2007-11-29 18:52:00
Third of British workers skip breakfast
Will you have breakfast after reading this story?
A third of office workers would rather grab a few minutes extra sleep than breakfast, according to a survey that estimated poor eating habits were costing companies dearly in terms of lost productivity.
A survey by Ipsos Mori found 17 percent of British office workers never have breakfast and 17 percent have it just one to three times a week.
It found eight percent of 1,051 office staff questioned also regularly skip lunch, with these poor eating habits estimated to be costing companies 17 billion pounds ($34 billion) a year or 97 million lost working days.
"Worryingly, of those who rarely or never eat lunch, 27 percent also never eat breakfast during the working week," said Ipsos Mori researchers in a statement.
The survey, commissioned by food service company BaxterStorey, estimated skipping breakfast cost companies 8.1 billion pounds or 46.5 million lost working days, with many studies finding a link between eating breakfast and attention span, learning ability and general well-being.
When other poor eating habits such as having no breakfast and lunch or having no breakfast and snacks, are included, lost productivity rocketed to nearly 17 billion pounds.
The survey found most employees -- 92 percent -- have lunch, with 68 percent opting for sandwiches, but most people don't drink enough during the day. Only 11 percent had the recommended eight or more drinks during the working day.
"People who eat breakfast have better concentration, problem solving ability, mental performance, memory and mood.
People who eat breakfast are also more physically energetic and have better coordination," said nutrition specialist Matt Barker.
"Research tells us that scores on memory tests were about 15 percent lower in people who skipped breakfast. And those who skip it tend to eat sugary, fatty foods later in the day, reducing their productivity."
一项调查显示，三分之一的上班族早上宁愿多睡几分钟，也不愿起床吃早餐。据该调查估计，员工不良的饮食习惯导致工作效率下降，从而给公司造成了巨大损失。
该项由益普索?莫里调查机构开展的调查发现，英国17%的办公室职员从不吃早餐，17%的人每周只吃一至三次早餐。
调查发现，在1051名受访的办公室职员中，8%的人经常不吃午餐。据估计，员工这些不良的饮食习惯每年给公司造成了170亿英镑（相当于9700万个工作日）的损失。
益普索?莫里调查机构在一份声明中说：“令人担忧的是，在那些很少或从来不吃午餐的人中，27%的人也从不吃早餐。”
据该项由BaxterStorey食品服务公司委托开展的调查估计，员工不吃早餐给公司造成的损失约81亿英镑（相当于4650万个工作日）。很多研究发现，是否吃早餐会影响注意力集中时间长度、学习能力及总体幸福感。
如果将其它一些不良的饮食习惯也算上，如不吃早餐和午餐或不吃早餐吃零食，公司所遭受的损则高达近170亿英镑。
调查发现，大多数员工（92%）吃午餐，其中68%的员工吃三明治；但大多数人每天摄水量不够，仅有11%的人每天喝水量达到建议的八杯水或者更多。
营养专家马特?巴克说：“吃了早餐的人注意力更加集中、解决问题的能力更强，智力表现、记忆力和心情也更好。此外，吃早餐的人更具活力，身体协调性更好。”
“研究人员称，不吃早餐的人记忆力测试得分约低15%。而且早上不吃饭的人之后可能会吃甜食和高脂肪食品，从而会影响他们的工作效率。”
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医生住在楼下！
2007-11-29 18:49:10
笑话
"Doctor," a woman said loudly, bouncing into the room,
"I want you to say frankly what's wrong with me." He surveyed her from head to foot.
"Madam," he said at length,
"I've just three things to tell you. First, your weight wants reducing by nearly fifty pounds. Second, your beauty could be improved if you used about one tenth as much rouge and lipstick. And third, I'm an artist---the doctor lives downstairs."
语言点：
1、bouncing into the room
bounce? 弹跳，跳上跳下，突然发出响亮的声音，撞击
bounce into the room? 猛然冲进房间
bounce back? 卷土重来
The patient bounced back to good health.病人很快痊愈了.
2、say frankly
frankly? 坦白地, 真诚地，坦率地
frankly speaking? 老实地说, 坦率地说
Frankly speaking, I don't like the job.坦率地说，我不喜欢这个工作.
3、survey? 测量, 调查，仔细地审视、打量
Two women were surveying the other people on the platform. 两个女子正在审视月台上的其他人.4、from head to foot? 从头到脚，全身
from head to heel
from top to toe
The lady is dressed in white from head to foot and looks like a bride. 那位女子全身穿着白色衣服，看起来像个新娘子。5、wants reducing by
want sb. to do sth.
want doing
The garden needs watering. 花园需要浇水。
These jobs want doing at once. 这些工作需要马上就做 -
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