how much i love you

after almost three month's untouch,i send a message to you today,not because i can't help contacting you this time ,but because i want to know hou are you going these days,i want to know whether you can pass through the graduate student exam .of couse may be this is the last time you do this .i wish you can pass it successfully,because i wish you can have a better life ,althrough without me company you.

  ever we lived in the same school ,same city ,ever i told you that i treated you as my close relatives ,althrough you didn't think so (you just think you parents are your close relatives),ever you would like to do everything for me,you would like buy beautiful clothes to me ,and gave me all the good things you have (including time),of course ,i showed myself truely before you(whatever laughing and crying ) ,ever ,even until the last time i call you ,i felt happy for the time i stayed two years with you in university.

  but all the above is over after i know you are not what i think so ,because i wish the person who gets along with me should feel happy ,and if not i will feel that i waste my time ,even waste my emotion,that's so horrible thing to me.but you just the person who felt unhappy ,so ,i decided to lose touch with you ,althrough i love you ,althrough you know how much i love you.for those days ,we didn't keep touch with each other, my sky was ashy ,i haven't mood to do anything ,just miss you day and night,many,many times i wanted to call you ,but i was afraid to hear the sad words you said to me ,time and time again i gave up the idea to contact you,maybe only those who have the same encounter can understand my mood those days.

  luckily,all those fuck days pass by,and now  i know we are two person ,you are not the person you once are ,and i am not the person i am,we start to become different since the moment we apart,maybe this is god's intention.long time ago you said we could do good friends ,however,i didn't think so ,i wouldn't like to be so,because we ever fell in love with each other ,we can't be good friends ,but still i wish you happy every day ,because you are the person i ever love,that's the only reason,you know.