If you do not think about the future, you can't have one. John Galsworthy,

我的最新日志

  • WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON WITH BEAR STEARN ?

    2008-3-17

    THESE TIER ONE SECURITIES HOUSES MAY NOT BE SOUNDING FAMILIAR TO MANY CHINESE BUT THEY ARE VERY FAMOUS IN ELSE WHERE ESPECIALLY IN WORLD'S MAJOR FINANCIAL CITIES.

    I MET QUITE A FEW SMART BANKERS FROM BEAR STEARN WHEN I WAS WORKING IN TOKYO.

    I CANT BELIEVE ALL OF THEM HAVE JUST LOST THEIR JOB AND SUCH A HUGE BANK COULD ACTUALLY COLLAPSE!!!

    WHAT HAS GONE WRONG WITH THE BEAR STEARNS AND WHERE THE HECK IS THE WORLD ECONOMY HEADING TOWARDS???

     

    Asian stocks tumble on Bear Stearns news

    By KELLY OLSEN, AP Business Writer 1 hour, 2 minutes ago

    SEOUL, South Korea - Asian stocks plunged and the dollar sank Monday after JPMorgan Chase said it would acquire troubled U.S. investment bank Bear Stearns, signaling to investors the depths of the credit crisis.

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    Oil prices hit a record in Asian trading and U.S. stock index futures were down sharply, suggesting Wall Street would open lower later Monday.

    JPMorgan said Sunday it would acquire Bear Stearns for $236.2 million — or $2 a share — in a deal that represents a stunning collapse for one of the world's largest and most venerable investment banks.

    The buyout was aimed at averting a bankruptcy and a spreading crisis of confidence in the global financial system.

    But to Asian investors the move suggested that the credit problems, triggered by defaults on risky U.S. mortgages, are far from over — and fanned worries that other big American banks could face serious troubles.

    "There is persistent credit uncertainty. Market players have been repeatedly let down which shows the subprime mortgage problems are so deep-rooted," said Atsuji Ohara, global strategist of Shinko Securities in Tokyo.

    "Just buying an investment bank does not solve the problem," he said. "Markets are prodding (the U.S. government) to inject public funds."

    News of the acquisition of Bear Stearns stunned investors just before markets opened in Tokyo and Seoul.

    Japan's benchmark 225 index sank 4.5 percent in early afternoon trading to 11,691.00 points, its lowest since July 2005. Hong Kong's Hang Seng index plunged as much as 5.4 percent before trimming some losses to trade at 21,304.38, down 4.2 percent.

    Across Asia, all major stock indexes were down, including markets in Australia, China, Indonesia and South Korea.

    "We are worried" about what comes next, Shim Jae-youb, a strategist at Meritz Securities in Seoul, said of concerns that other banks may face collapse.

    He said investors were on guard ahead of the release of quarterly earnings reports from big U.S. investment banks this week, including Lehman Brothers Holdings Inc., Goldman Sachs Group Inc., and Morgan Stanley. Bear Stearns had been scheduled to report its results Monday, though it wasn't clear if it would go ahead with that plan.

    In an extraordinarily rare weekend move, the Federal Reserve took bold action Sunday evening by cutting the discount rate, its lending rate to financial institutions, to 3.25 percent from 3.5 percent, effective immediately. The Fed also created another lending facility for big investment banks to secure short-term loans that would be available to big Wall Street firms on Monday.

    The Fed was also widely expected to again cut its headline interest rate by as much as a full percentage point to 2 percent at a regular meeting set for Tuesday.

    In currency trading, the dollar plunged to 95.72 yen — its lowest since August 1995 — driven down by a gloomy outlook for the American economy and prospects for lower interest rates. The euro rose to $1.5839.

    Oil prices, meanwhile, hit an all-time trading high in Asia as the greenback's tumble and decline in stock markets prompted investors to seek shelter in commodities such as crude oil. Light, sweet crude for April delivery spiked to a record $111.42 a barrel in electronic trading on the New York Mercantile Exchange.

    On Friday, U.S. stocks sank after the announcement of a Fed plan in conjunction with JPMorgan to alleviate the liquidity crisis at Bear Stearns touched off concerns about the severity of credit troubles in the world's largest economy. The Dow Jones industrial average fell 194.65, or 1.60 percent, to 11,951.09.

    Wall Street appeared poised for another drop when trading resumed Monday morning. Dow index futures were down 232 points, or 1.9 percent, to 11,750, while the Standard & Poor's 500 index was down 21.7 points or 1.65 percent, to 1,291.6.

    __

    Associated Press writers Chisaki Watanabe in Tokyo, Gillian Wong in Singapore and Anthony Deutsch in Jakarta contributed to this report.

  • Sheryl Crow's song.

    2008-3-10

    In addition to the song list that i posted in my blog the other day , Here is a few more songs that I really like about. Though its all from the same artist, Sheryl Crow. Her singing style is quite unique as blending various music elements in her songs, i can hear a  bit of country and a bit of  rock and a bit of ballad at times .... her songs are just wonderful. You can check her MVs out in Youtube or Youku. I can guarantee your satisfaction during the  listening of the songs.

    Its amazing that she is still so popular after 10+ years of media exposure. Apart from her dazzling talents , she is a brave woman too. She has just survived from a breast cancer. Good for her.

    The First Cut Is The Deepest"(This song was actually in the background of the movie, Must Love Dogs, Love comedy stars Diane Lane and John Cusack , quite fun flick. i would recommend it to those who are looking for second chance in Love.)

    I would have given you all of my heart
    But there's someone who's torn it apart
    And he's taken just all that I have
    But if you want I'll try to love again
    Baby, I'll try to love again, but I know...

    The first cut is the deepest
    Baby I know
    The first cut is the deepest
    But when it comes to bein' lucky, he's cursed
    When it comes to lovin' me, he's worst...

    I still want you by my side
    Just to help me dry the tears that I've cried
    And I'm sure gonna give you a try
    If you want I'll try to love again, (try)
    Baby, I'll try to love again, but I know...

    OOHHH,
    The first cut is the deepest
    Baby I know
    The first cut is the deepest
    But when it comes to bein' lucky, he's cursed
    But when it comes to lovin' me, he's worst...

    I still want you by my side
    Just to help me dry the tears that I've cried
    But I'm sure gonna give you a try
    Cuz if you want I'll try to love again
    (Try to love again, try to love again)
    Baby, I'll try to love again but I know, OOHHH....

    The first cut is the deepest
    Baby I know
    The first cut is the deepest
    When it comes to bein' lucky, he's cursed
    When it comes to lovin' me, he's worst

    OOHHH, the first cut is the deepest
    Baby I know (baby I know)
    The first cut is the deepest
    Try to love again...

    Here is one more ....

    "Good Is Good"
    Good is good and bad is bad
    You don抰 know which one you had
    She put your books out on the sidewalk
    Now they抮e blowing 憆ound
    They won抰 help you when you抮e down

    Love抯 on your list of things to do
    To bring your good luck back to you
    And if you think that everything抯 unfair
    Would you care if you抮e the last one standing there

    And everytime you hear the rolling thunder
    You turn around before the lightening strikes
    And does it ever make you stop and wonder
    If all your good times pass you by

    I don抰 hold no mystery
    But I can show you how to turn the key
    Cause all I know is where I started
    So downhearted
    And that抯 not where you want to be

    And everytime you hear the rolling thunder
    You turn around before the lightening strikes
    And you could find a rock to crawl right under
    If all your good times pass you by

    When the day is done
    And the world is sleeping
    And the moon is on its way to shine
    When your friends are gone
    You thought were so worth keeping
    You feel you don抰 belong
    And you don抰 know why

    And everytime you hear the rolling thunder
    You turn around before the lightening strikes
    And does it ever make you stop and wonder
    If all your good times pass you by

    When the day is done
    And the world is sleeping
    And the moon is on its way to shine
    When your friends are gone
    You thought were so worth keeping
    You feel you don抰 belong
    Neither do I.

    ------------------------------------

    Actually there is a lot of songs from 90ties are just great ! If you have time, you can also check out ''what if god was one of us "  from Joan Osborne, etc. They are just good !


  • Learning the western Alphabet -Hilary Jenkins

    2008-3-09

    Learning The Western Alphabet

    Acupuncture

    That morning I had studying to do, five pages of intensive reading to learn by heart before the class in the afternoon, but I smile sweetly when they ask me to take the Foreigner to the Acupuncture Clinic. The leaders have decided that I should be the Foreigner's Minder, and the Foreigner wants to see some acupuncture, so I have to take him. I don't understand why he wants to go, he's not even ill. But I don't question it.
         The hospital is on the far side of the university campus, on the lower slopes of Yue Lu mountain, and as we walk along the path between the blocks of flats everyone stares at us: why is a pretty young student like me walking next to this tall, big nosed, pink faced Foreigner? One peasant woman drops her basket, and vegetables roll all over the road in front of us.
         'What are those long green things?' he asks, watching her as she scrambles to pick them up. Has he never seen bamboo shoots before?
         'Why do you want to see acupuncture?' I wasn't planning to ask, it just came out of my mouth, in English.
         'China is famous for it. I thought it might be fun to see.' Fun?
         'It's for when you're ill, in pain,' I say. 'Not for show.' How could something so old fashioned and ordinary be special for him?
         The hospital smells of herbal medicines, a sharp green smell that reminds me of childhood illnesses and my mother's cool hand on my hot forehead.
         'God awful smell,' he says.
         In the clinic a nurse is treating the neck of an old woman suffering from rheumatism. Under her short, roughly-cut hair, they stick out like knitting needles from a half finished sock. As the nurse manipulates them, pushing them further in, the old woman sighs with the familiar pain.
         I try to make things easier by saying, 'They don't have acupuncture in England.' The nurse mutters, 'Big nosed barbarians!' She pushes in the needles more forcibly, twisting them like those poles with spinning plates at the circus. There is a groan behind me and the Foreigner, green as the young bamboos, falls back on to the wooden floor boards, just missing the corner of a large metal cupboard. What if I'd injured him on my first morning as Official Minder? As I wait for his eyes to open, the nurse carries on angrily pulling out and replacing the needles in the brown, worn flesh.

    < 2 >


    Bamboo

    On her parents' grey concrete balcony there's just room enough for two low chairs, made of yellow bamboo, roughly cut and split. I like the ethnic look but they are far too small for me. There is no way I can fold myself up to fit in them, so I have to sit with my legs out in front of me, my size 11 trainers almost as big as the chairs themselves. She laughs at my awkwardness, her own legs and feet thin and tiny as a child's. When she goes inside, the wire meshed door bangs behind her. I can hear her talking with her mother: their voices are loud and screechy in contrast to their tiny birdlike bodies. She comes back with a plate of 'Lucky Rabbit Milk Sweets', and a white porcelain mug with a lid. Inside it, in the greenish water, a few leaves are unfolding like leeches.
         'Special tea from Jiang Jia Jie, but no milk! So sorry,' she laughs. I've been in China long enough to know it is embarrassed laughter. She'd insisted I come round to meet her parents, even though I wasn't very keen. I knew that visiting people in their homes was disapproved of. I'd been told that 'people would be too ashamed to show a foreigner their low living standards', that was how they'd put it to me. So I expected it would be awkward, and I was right: her father nodded at me and then disappeared immediately into the bedroom, while her mother is still hovering smiling uncertainly in the hallway that serves as their kitchen, with its line of brightly coloured flasks. She would have taken them down to the boiler house that morning like all the other women round here: standing in a queue for the day's supply of hot water for the endless green tea.
         'Why don't you just boil a kettle at home when you feel like a cuppa?' I ask MingMing as she watches me struggling with the tea leaves.
         'Wait till they have settled at the bottom and then sip,' she says. And then, 'Because it would be wasteful of fuel of course.'
         It was something else I would not be able to understand. Like why sticking needles in people's necks could be called treatment rather than torture. OK I know that's an ancient tradition. The big mystery here is how all these people live together almost on top of each other, sharing the same boiler for heavens sake, and don't explode with frustration all the time. I know I would.

    < 3 >

         Later MingMing takes me for a walk in the hills behind the college 'because it's important to exercise in the spring.' She's always coming out with these cute motherly expressions. When I laugh, she looks at me blankly. I suppose it's as if I were to guffaw the next time my mum says 'wrap up warm'. It's odd how we just grow up with all these expressions and never question them. We only notice other people's.
         We pass an old temple roofed with yellow tiles, its wooden eaves carved with lucky dragons. She tells me it is being used as a wood store.
         'Old style' she said. 'Old things, we don't like them any more.' Walking behind her up the narrow path I note her glossy hair in its simple black pony tail, her white cotton blouse and what looks like a home made skirt made from curtain material: too long to be sexy, too short to be fashionable. She wears nylon knee socks and plastic sandals. I hope this isn't her best, and that if it is, she isn't wearing her best for me. Chinese women do nothing for me. Should I tell her that, just to make sure she doesn't get the wrong idea?
         'There,' she says, pointing out some strange red shoots in the earth. 'Bamboo. It's green and then white inside. The peasants dig them up and sell them in the market. They're good to eat.'
         'So you eat chairs,' I say. She hesitates, not wanting to contradict me.
         'Chair-to-be,' she says. 'Isn't that what you say: wife-to-be?'


    Cultural Pollution Campaign

    I go to the Friday afternoon meeting and find that we have a new campaign. Our Revered Leaders, the Old Men of the People's Republic of China, are worried about the young people getting too influenced by the outside world, now that we have foreign experts even in Changsha. This time there are five 'blacks': no pony tails, no skirts, no immoral foreign authors, no idle talk with foreigners, no empty modern music. Old Zhang asks me, as Class Monitor, to make sure the red banners with their black characters are painted by the students, and hung from the classroom windows. The loudspeaker outside the guest house is to be turned up particularly loud. They call this campaign 'Cultural Pollution'. My father says it isn't a real campaign; no one is going to get thrown out of their windows or paraded round the campus. My mother isn't so sure: 'Be careful,' she says to me. 'Just do what they say, I'll help you plait your hair, and make you some trousers: army green, I've got enough coupons saved up. I'll make them tonight. And don't see the foreign ghost any more.'

    < 4 >

         I tell her the leaders have asked me to carry on being his Minder. It's an honour: they don't trust anyone else. I am top of my class and on the waiting list to become a party member. I am the only one allowed to talk to him. 'Well don't bring him here again,' says my father. 'Foreign ghosts always mean trouble.'
         'He's not a foreign ghost, he's a foreign expert,' I say. 'Deng Xiao Ping himself says we should invite foreign experts so that we can learn from them and develop China into a world power. He's come to help,' I add, as the wire mesh door swings closed behind my father.
         'Let him sit in the sun in peace,' says my mother. 'He's an old man. I must air his camel hair trousers ready for the winter.'


    Dumplings

    We'd planned to have a dumpling party for the whole class at my place, but no one else turned up.
         'The others can't attend,' she says. 'They have to go to a meeting.'
         'What kind of meeting?'
         'Just a meeting, you know how we Chinese love meetings.'
         'Even in the evenings?'
         '...especially in the evenings.'
         I am furious with her: it had been her idea to have the party. She said she knew I'd love dumplings, and we'd been shopping that afternoon in the college free market (a fancy name for a group of peasants squatting in the mud by the front gate) to buy all the ingredients. I'd been chopping green things for hours, while she kneaded pastry. How could they all be at a meeting except her? I know that there is some kind of campaign on: there are new banners everywhere with their angry red characters I can't read, the early morning exercise music is now old army songs played at top volume, and all the girls have plaited their hair, and hidden their legs in baggy trousers, army green or army blue. They look hideous.
         'What's going on then?' I say, all the time I cut the pastry circles for the dumplings, that she expertly fills and firmly closes. Every one is exactly the same. 'Why does no one come to see me any more? It's not just tonight, is it? No one's spoken to me for weeks.'
         'Nothing going on. You are our Teacher. We all love you,' she says. What a little hypocrite she is, sneakily hiding things from me, pretending everything is normal. I see red, lose my temper, and bang the rickety stove, just two rings balanced on a gas cylinder. It proves to her, and the neighbours above and below, that I am the beast they have been warned about. The pan full of bubbling dumplings falls to the floor, and we stand in silence and watch the mess coagulate.

    < 5 >

         She is crying as she unplaits her hair, combs it through with a small bamboo comb she took from her trouser pocket, and ties it back in a pony tail.
         'You are my teacher, I don't care what they say,' she says. 'Come with me. Let's go to a place I know where they make better dumplings than I can.'
         So we walk through some back streets to a tiny shack of a restaurant: one table and four or five stools. There is a dirt floor, crunchy with discarded bones, and the rafters above us are black with thousands of years of history I would never understand. As the steam rises from the stack of bamboo steamers, I feel sorry for her but I don't know what to say or how to say it. I see that she is brave, much braver than I am. I want to apologise for not understanding, and for knocking over the pan, but I don't know how to apologise. I remember the briefing I was given about losing face: if I apologise would she feel bad about accepting my apology? She would want to pretend it hadn't happened. Have I compromised my position as teacher? Then she slips a piece of paper to me over the greasy surface of the table, and as we eat, she translates the newspaper article from the Beijing Daily: it lists all the decadent western authors forbidden by the present 'cultural pollution campaign': Lawrence, Joyce, Woolf, Cheever.
         'Can you teach me about all these? I want to know what they are trying to hide from us.'


    Eels

    I have got written permission from the leaders to take him shopping. I have to do this every time we go anywhere together, but I have never told him about it, or how difficult it is for me, if he goes out somewhere without me. Or if he suddenly asks to go somewhere when I'm not prepared. Sometimes I make excuses. Once I ignored the rules altogether but they found out. I don't want to take that risk again. They might send me to a school to teach instead of letting me stay at the university. The students with the best marks are always invited to teach here, unless they make a mistake. I used to think it would be hard to make a mistake, but now I think it might be easy.

    < 6 >

         I've borrowed a bicycle for him. I was surprised when he told me he could ride a bicycle: I thought only Chinese people rode bicycles, because on the TV foreigners all drove cars. They are both flying pigeon bikes, the best, from Shanghai. He didn't look very impressed when I pointed this out. Maybe they have different ones in England, but I don't believe they could be any better than our flying pigeons. We ride along the river bank and over the Xiang Jiang, the Fragrant River, where Chairman Mao swam one hot, hot day. My father said it was madness, all the old men of the college, swimming with him, to prove their loyalty. Some of them died of heart attacks, but Chairman Mao only laughed. It was a brave way to die, he said, for true comrades.
         I explain to him how in those days, when the traffic lights were red it meant go, and when green it meant stop. Red for revolution. Red for double happiness, for weddings.
         'Our railway station is one of the biggest in the country,' I tell him, 'its clock plays 'The East is Red' on the hour, and the number one train comes from Beijing to Changsha, because it was Mao's home city. I could take you to his birthplace if you like, one day. There's a big museum there. It's a nice place for a picnic.'
         'Sounds deadly boring,' he says. We turn off May 1st road, where the bicycles ride five abreast, and parked our bikes in a parking lot. I tip the old man in charge. 'Take special care of the foreigner's bike,' I say.
         'And yours too, Little Miss Pretty,' he adds, flirting with me. I smile. The college boys don't know how to flirt.
         The market is spread out along the lane, peasant men and women squatting behind their baskets of vegetables. He wants green peppers, tomatoes and potatoes, and when I find them, asks me to buy several kilos even though I explain that they are charging high prices because he is a foreigner. Then I buy some eels for my mother. They are swimming in a wooden barrel. After the peasant woman has weighed out my share, she takes each one and splits it on the sharp knife that she has stuck in the wooden block for that purpose. The wood is dark with blood. I take the trembling mass in a piece of newspaper she hands to me.

    < 7 >

         'It's my father's favourite dish. It's good for the lungs and liver,' I explain. 'Shall I get some for you?'
         'You're a murderer,' he says. 'A nation of murderers. I'm joking,' he adds, but I'm not sure. Foreign ghosts are hard to understand. But the eels taste wonderful with my mother's turnip chilli pickle and steamed rice from the canteen. I think about him that evening as I eat, and wonder what he's doing with those expensive peppers and tomatoes, they cost a week's salary for a university teacher.


    Ferry

    It took me some time to realise that no one else dares to talk to me. If I want sex while I am in China, she is my only hope. I'd boasted on the plane over about not being celibate in this land of one child families, but it is proving more difficult than I'd thought. MingMing is like no other woman I've ever met. Coy is not the word: it is a completely different language, like going back in time to the Thirties, or the Victorians maybe. I have to admit that when we first met, I didn't find her at all attractive.
         Not until that day she took me cycling on the usual heavy black bicycle with no gears. I can't think why they are called Flying Pigeons. Anyway, one Sunday she suggests we go into the countryside and I am more than delighted to get out of the college, and away from the constant staring that goes on round here. Once we get to the end of the main road east of town I realise she has no idea where we are going, so I take out from my bag the map I'd been given in London. First she tells me that it is illegal to have a map, and then when we've found a place out of sight of the road to open it, I realise she has no idea how to read it. I have to ask her to read the names of towns, and then I work out which paths might lead to them. I set off with a great sense of freedom and she follows me, happy to let me guide her through her own countryside.
         It turns out to be an intricate pattern of paddy fields, edged with mud banks just wide enough for one bicycle, or a single wheelbarrow with its whining wheel and grunting pig. There are villages of mud bricks surrounded by trees, buffaloes, and flocks of ducks guarded by small boys. It is wonderfully liberating to ride along on top of the dykes, seeing China, but not feeling part of it. So I am in a good mood when we stop by the edge of a river, and wait for the wooden ferry boat to come from the other side. We lay down our bikes and sit down together to drink some water from an old green army bottle she has brought, and eat peanuts and melon seeds. She has to teach me how to crack these with my teeth, spit out the husks, and swallow the seed. She does this ugly task very delicately. Crack, spit, swallow. I watch her mouth and then without thinking, lean over and kiss her red lips. I can taste the salt from the roasted seeds. She blushes, but then to my surprise, she kisses me back, and her red mouth opens into mine. As the ferry heads into the muddy bank I realise she is, let's say, fuckable. The only question in my mind is 'when?'

    < 8 >


    Green Ghost

    My name is Zhou MingMing, you could say it means 'shining brightness' or 'double beautiful' something like that. It is a traditional kind of name for parents to give daughters. Many of my friends have revolutionary names like 'Be Red' or 'Strong China'. I'd just had my eighteenth birthday that Spring Festival, the year of the Hare, the year he came to our university. Suddenly we are told that our leaders have invited a Foreign Expert to come and teach us. It is a miracle. Nothing so exciting has ever happened before in our university. None of us have ever met a foreigner before. No one knows quite what to expect. Will he look like those tall big nosed Americans who sleep in enormous soft double beds, in separate rooms from their wives?
         On the first day of term, Old Zhang gives us new exercise books, and on them we write as instructed 'Mr Green: English Conversation'. How odd to be called after a colour other than red. Green Ghost would teach us two hours every morning, from 7.30. We should be punctual, polite and obedient, and learn from him all we could. We were not to talk to him as a friend, as foreign ghosts were lecherous and untrustworthy. Only the class monitor would be allowed to talk to him, in her role as Green Ghost Minder, and that monitor was me.
         My classmates are envious, my parents worried. It is not a privilege they told me, it's a test. Be on your guard. They want to test you. I promise to report back to the leaders every week, tell them everything he has said, and done; any attempts to touch me; any unpatriotic words; and report all other visitors who went to see him. You see, said my parents, they have only chosen you because our flat is nearby. You can see the comings and goings. It's not because you are anyone special.
         That first day I am nervous, we all are. Old Zhang introduces him, tells us to be good students, and then sits down in the front row, leaving Mr Green alone on the platform. I think he is the most beautiful man I have ever seen. I forgive him the big nose and pink skin. He looks at us and we look at him. Then he turns round to the blackboard, and fumbles for chalk. I get up and show him where it is kept, one half piece allowed for each teacher each week. He doesn't look at me. He smells of milk. He says, 'My name is Mar Tin Green,' and gestures to us. We repeat after him, 'My name is Mar Tin Green.' So he turns to the board and starts to write 'My name is....' Then as the chalk shatters and covers him in a cloud of dust, he says, 'Fucking hell,' and we obediently repeat it after him, all sixty of us, 'My name is Fucking Hell.'

    < 9 >


    Hare

    Have you ever heard that old Chinese tale about the hare looking at the moon, or was it a tree? My mother used to have a tiny jade ornament, of a hare with its nose in the air. I think the moral is, don't expect good luck to come round more than once. Anyway this is how the students looked at me, those first few lessons. Mesmerised by my voice (they whispered after me everything I said), my face (my big nose), my hair (which is dull brown but they call blond), my size 11 feet (enormous). It isn't wonder in their faces, more a polite horror that anyone could be so physically repulsive. It is a shock: I've always felt moderately attractive. Until now.
         I soon realise that it is going to be hard to teach conversation to 60 students. No one will answer a direct question from me (it is not our Chinese custom) and no one will talk in pairs if I ask them to (they do talk, but not in English). The old guy who introduced me that first time turns out to know no English at all. He sits in the front row and sleeps, while I talk to myself. So I get them to write about themselves instead. The first essay is about the wonderful Communist Party of China, and so is the second. Both essays are just about the same, and I am about to accuse them of copying, until I realised all 60 are identical. Someone must be organising them, telling them what to write. I suspect my Minder. But when I ask her she is indignant, and shows me the first exercise they had been set in their writing class that term: they had all copied the set exercise and translated it into English.
         'Can't you think for yourselves?' I'd said.
         'It's not because we don't have minds,' she said. 'It's because this is what the Chinese teachers want. If you want something different you must say so, but we will be careful what we write. We don't know who will read it. We have to consider our futures.'
         'I will read it,' I say. 'Only me. You can write what you want.' She looks doubtful. It is then I decide to bring some literature pieces into class. Surely they would get discussion going. MingMing brightens up at the suggestion. 'Who shall we read?' I ask her.

    < 10 >

         'Shelley,' she said, 'Ode to the West Wind is in our reader.' So Shelley it is.
         'Why is it the west wind?' I asked them. They shrug collectively, all the ones who are not looking out of the window, or finishing other work under the old desks.
         'Because it is the warm wind that brings spring!'
         'Not in China,' says MingMing. 'Here it is the east wind that brings the warm weather.' That stumps me. What did I know about anything? Why teach English Literature in China? They hadn't even heard of Mickey Mouse.
         So I ask them to write an essay about their feelings about Shelley's Ode. I get fifty nine essays about the keen revolutionary spirit of PBS, and one about what a wonderful husband and father he was. 'Utter crap,' I tell the poor girl. 'Where did you get that from?' She shows me the text book, and reads from it 'PBS was a wonderful husband and father because he was a keen revolutionary spirit...'
         MingMing tells me off afterwards, for making her lose face in front of her classmates, for not understanding what it is like to live here, learning another language and culture without access to books. With only the occasional dubbed American film.
         'Try and see it from our point of view,' she says, angry but sexy. I promise. I'd vowed never to promise a woman anything ever again, but I do. This is not how I thought culture shock would be.


    Ink

    He wanted to learn to write characters, and asked me to find him a teacher.
         'I can teach you,' I say, and so I take round some brushes, an ink stone and a book of characters: the kind small children copy in kindergarten. I explain about the strokes, how to hold the brush, how to dip it in the ink, how to move it, how to put the brush on to the paper, and take it off again, without leaving a blot. How important the pressure is, to get the stroke looking just right, the character well balanced. I make him do fifty attempts at 'I'. The last one is perfect.
         I explain how each character is made up of strokes in a given order. How as children we spend many hours learning the ideograms. He says it is easier to learn just the twenty six letters in the western alphabet, but I argue that it could not be as subtle. I try to explain how the look of the character is as important as the meaning. I point out how we write from top to bottom, from right to left, and how he writes from left to right.

    < 11 >

         I explain about rice paper, and how to paste two sheets of it together so that the paper can take the ink. I tell him the names of different types of calligraphy: flowing, water, grass. He says he thought it would be easy but it makes me laugh to watch him concentrating so hard, on holding the brush correctly, and making the strokes in the right order, and then producing characters that a five year old could have done better. I do my best to explain about flow, and pressure, and breathing. How the brush strokes should be as natural as grass growing by the side of the path. I have to stand close to him as we do this, my small hand on his large one, guiding the strokes.
         I want him to kiss me again, like he did when we waited for the ferry. There had been no one to see us. Here anyone could see us through the window, and report me. I dare not ask him to kiss me again.
         I want him to want to kiss me.
         I want everyone to see.


    Jade

    All the time I am copying those wretched characters, I am watching her jade coloured neck, and the fine bones of her hands. Her hair is up, and her face as she concentrates on the brush stokes, is beautiful, wide and flat, almost moon shaped. You see, I've read the Dream of the Red Chamber (it is her favourite book). I am becoming obsessed with her, and long for these evenings when the only sound is the drying of ink on rice paper.
         I thought when I first came here that I would have fun. I know they'd warned me about culture shock, but this is not what I imagined, this slow sloughing off of my usual ways of behaving, and tuning myself into her. I didn't know I could do this. I've never done anything like this before. Those first few weeks I missed the blokes at home, the girls, especially Kate. I realised that one reason for coming here was to get away from seeing her and Justin together. I didn't expect life here to be so strange, and I didn't expect to fall in love.


    Kashgar

    The summer is terribly hot, even for Changsha. We lie on bamboo mats and never move far from the fans. Mar Tin has air conditioning in his flat but even so, he goes travelling once the temperature hits 40 degrees. He has money and can go where he pleases. The rest of us have to stay in our units, where our permits allow us to live and collect boiled water and buy rice.

    < 12 >

         He gave me his key and said I could use the air conditioning, but I know that the neighbours will complain that it is too noisy, keeping them awake, so I don't go there. We get up very early, and do our chores while it is still cool, and then spend all day lying inside and sweating. I try to read and study. When I can't bear it any longer I stand under the cold shower until my skin starts to soften. As soon as I dress again I am sweating. If he were here would I want to touch him?
         He sends me a postcard from Kashgar. It is so far away from here. Why does he want to go there? The people in the far west are rough and uncouth. It's the kind of place you go if you disobey the leaders. I didn't tell him but my uncle lives in Urumuchi. He fell in love with a student, and when the leaders found out, he was banished. He's never come back, and we've never seen him in all these years. We never talk about him. This is why I was sad when he said he wanted to go there this holiday. I was hoping he'd go somewhere like Hangzhou. I'd love to go and see the lake there. I was hoping he'd ask me to go with him. I could have gone as his translator. I will keep his postcard in my pocket. Next summer we must go to Hangzhou together.


    Latrines

    First day of term, and I go into the English faculty building to find the teachers cleaning the latrines. Wang and Wu are in their wellingtons, sloshing water around in a foul smelling bucket. I try to commiserate but they seemed to think it perfectly reasonable for them to spend their morning cleaning, instead of preparing their lessons. Maybe it is a propitiation rite: we'll clean your toilets if you behave all term. I leave quickly before they ask me to join them. No way am I going to go anywhere near those evil smelling loos. I can't believe that anything they do will improve the stink that wafts round the classrooms all year.
         There is no sign of MingMing. I feel kind of miffed that she didn't come round to see me the night before. She must know I am back. Her parents' flat is just across from mine. Besides, everyone knows everything round here, especially about me. While I was away I worked out that I am about a third of the way through my time here, and no way am I going to last the year without some sex. Besides I think I have fallen for her. I never expected to fall for a Chinese woman. They are way too small, tiny breasts and no hips to talk of. But her face is pretty, and I've got used to her talking to me as if I am a small child that needs keeping under control. In fact I've been thinking about her a lot, all the time I was away. Of course it could have been that there were no women there worth looking at. Most were covered up in long shapeless dresses, their hair in scarves, the young ones looking just like their mothers. Back in Han China, the girls look positively liberated in their short skimpy dresses, and nylon socks.
         And I haven't forgotten that kiss by the ferry. Something told me that had been her first. I'd expected her to come on for more by now.

    < 13 >


    Moon Festival

    When I was a child I used to look forward to Spring Festival because of the new clothes, the lucky money envelopes, and the firecrackers, but now I think the Moon Festival is my favourite. I love the way we watch out for the new moon, noticing how it fills out each night, a little rounder and smoother, until it is perfect. And I love the moon cakes my mother buys from the shops. It's the only time in the year she buys ready made food. I love their gaily decorated boxes, and the patterned paper in which each is wrapped, their golden colour, and the chrysanthemum flowers and lucky characters on them: so that taking a bite is like eating poetry. Inside the moon cakes there are lotus seeds and date paste, or egg and chestnuts, delicious things that we rarely eat. I like to think they are a bit like the English mince-pies we read about in our extensive readers at school. We eat them for the memories.
         You have a white paper lantern hanging in your window. Behind on the glass hangs its reflection, and the real moon is low in the sky behind them both. Double moons, double happiness. I take you two boxes of red crane moon cakes, one is from my mother, and one from me. Each has four cakes, enough for a feast. I show you how to unwrap each one, and then we cut one, the special one with the egg inside and we eat it together. Or rather I eat it, you cough a little and say you find it 'interesting.' That evening you switch off the light, and we sit by the window, listening to the rats scrabbling in the rubbish pit below, and watching the moon rise. I recite poetry to you, the poems I can still remember from school, Ming dynasty poems about watching the moon rising, while remembering my beloved. And I feel so very happy that I haven't lost my beloved. You are right beside me, holding my hand and stroking my hair.


    National Day

    I like to think that things may have developed nicely that night. She was all flushed and happy from reciting the poetry, and telling me how many prizes she had won at school for her perfect Mandarin. If it hadn't been for those rotten cakes. They were disgusting; a combination of sweet and sour, and a consistency that made me gag. I only ate a sliver but she gobbled down at least two, before she started to turn pale and then green and had to spend the rest of the evening in the bathroom. It turned out all the cakes that year were rotten: they'd over produced the year before, and so instead of producing new ones, they simply re-cooked last year's and sold them as fresh. Almost the whole college is ill. And the rats must be ill too, as I threw my remaining moon cakes on the tip, and they were all gone in one night.

    < 14 >

         I hardly see her for a few weeks after that. When I do bump into her in the faculty she says she is preparing for National Day. Apparently they all have to read Marx or Mao or something, as a kind of ritual purification for the great day. I don't think I believe her. I think she's playing hard to get, Chinese style.


    Oranges

    Hunan is famous for rice, fish and oranges. When they tell us over the tannoy that there are oranges for sale in the campus shop I rush over with my mother and we queue for two hours. We buy two boxes: one for us and one for you. I show you how to wrap each one in pages of the People's Daily, so that they will last you through the winter. Sometimes our hands touch as we place the fruit back into the box.
         I show you the paper the orange company had given me. They want to export their fruit and have asked me to translate their leaflets into English. I tell you I have translated the paper as 'fruit freshness preservation paper'. You laugh and said this is not how you'd say it in English. The more you laugh the less I can admit that it is my translation you are laughing at. We settle on 'special paper which will preserve the freshness of the fruit', but I know the company will prefer my original translation, and I need my 100 yuan fee.
         Some time in the autumn I ask you about your oranges. You've forgotten them and the whole box has turned mouldy. I say nothing. What a waste, I almost cried. I want to tell you all the tales my mother told me about how hard things were in the past, how careful we all are about not wasting anything because of those hard times. About how when the cultural revolution started and the colleges closed, my mother walked home, for four days, back to her village, and how the blisters on her feet swelled up like kumquats, they were so bad that the peasants showed her how to take a hair from her head, gently insert it and drain the fluid away. This is my past. You know nothing about how hard life was for my parents, and all the people here. And how hard it is for me. I've had a warning, and I've told them I know what I'm doing. I do my best to stay away from you.

    < 15 >


    Puffed rice machine

    It is bloody cold. There's no heating south of the Yangtze and we are some kilometres south of it, so tough. It may snow, but no heating. Old Zhou brings me a fire bowl, filled with charcoal, and shows me how to sit with my legs over it, and how to keep the window open to avoid the fumes. I decide it is warmer to stay in bed. This makes it more awkward when she comes to see me, in her thick padded jacket and trousers, that turn her into Michelin man. She makes it clear that I can't receive her in bed, so we sit in the other room our frozen hands round the ubiquitous cup of green tea. How I long for a cup of PG tips with milk and two sugars. Not to mention central heating. In the classrooms the students sweep up odd bits of paper and light fires on the concrete floors. I teach them some songs with hand movements, just to keep my own blood circulating. Heads, shoulders, knees and toes, that kind of thing. When I say they could use these with their own future classes, they look doubtful. They only put up with me, because my lessons were easier than the others, and, I like to think, more enjoyable.
         However it is just after our final round of Heads, shoulders, knees and toes, that I hear the noise. A kind of horn calling insistently. 'What's that?' I asked MingMing, who always sits at the front of the class, in front of me. I've noticed that the other students kept their distance from her. 'Rice puffer man,' she says. 'You take your rice, and he will puff it up in his machine. It has a fire in it,' she adds.
         'Great,' I say. 'Class dismissed.'
         We run up to my flat and fill a pan with rice from the sack in the corner of my kitchen. I pick out the ants as we join the queue of housewives and chattering children. The people immediately round us are silent as they stare at me, not wanting to lose the opportunity to have a good look. The rice puffer man wears the standard green padded army coat, just like mine, except that his has holes in it where the cotton padding is escaping. He has a green army hat with ear flaps, and shouts 'Bring your rice! Get it puffed!' (I'm guessing here) continually over the noise of his machine. Rice is poured in, a lid is closed, there is a bang, and rice krispies pour out the other end. It is magical. I hand him my two yuan with joy and we rush home, only to remember of course that I don't have any milk. Never mind, they are delicious on their own. I eat a whole bowl full sitting in bed, fully clothed under three quilts. She sits next to me and waits till I've finished. With the help of the puffed rice man and a freezing cold day, I have caught her.

    < 16 >


    Quilt

    Our quilts are filled with soft white cotton, sewn together loosely with red cotton thread. Each summer, while we sleep on bamboo mats in the great heat, we spread the quilts outside in the sun. When they get too thin we send them to the quilt makers who unpick the cotton and add more. There is nothing as warm as cotton. You've told me about wool and feathers and modern synthetic materials but I don't believe you. There is nothing warmer than a quilt below and one on top. We sew the quilts into white cotton covers, with a silk top. Yours is one of the best kind: embroidered with a pair of dragons in green thread against the pink silk. I tell you that they represent the emperor and empress from the old days, when the Chinese people suffered, before Mao freed us from the old capitalist days. You laugh at me, and call me your little empress. You say you have never seen anything as beautiful as my body. I tell you I love you, and you say you love me, and so great is the heat between my legs that I open myself to you, and hope the Wangs in the flat below don't hear the bed rocking, and your cries as you come deep inside me.
         Afterwards you fall asleep in my arms, as the sticky wetness flows from me on to your white sheet. I am sore, but happy because I know that we will have a son, and that we will both go with you back to the UK. I can see us walking up the steps of the plane, turning to wave at the top, as our leaders do on China News. Our son will only speak English. I will start teaching him the western alphabet straight away, by tracing out the letters on my stomach.


    Revolution

    She knows nothing about sex, but I don't mind. I am so glad to be fucking again. I have taught her what I like and she is undemanding. That suits me. The only problem is that she starts to talk about marriage straight away. At first I thought it was a joke, then I realise she is deadly serious. OK I think, let her talk and make plans. Maybe I do want a Chinese wife. Why not? She's beautiful enough. She'll look after me, cook, and do house work and so on. She's hard working. She'll be able to help me if I carry on teaching EFL, we can travel the world together. Being married could be kind of useful. But I have no plans to tell my parents just yet, and so I tell her I didn't want to be introduced to her parents as a fianc?so soon.

    < 17 >

         'We must tell them first,' she says. 'Before the others find out. Then I'll be in trouble. I'm not the ideal age, yet, I haven't been given permission by the leaders to get married, so I need to have my parents' permission. And then no one will gossip.'
         'What will your parents think? Do they need to know yet?'
         Her eyes open wide in terror. 'Of course they need to know, I don't hide things from them, I cannot. We live too closely. And if I'm... I'm... my mother will know, perhaps before I do.'
         'But what's your father going to say? About his daughter marrying a penniless EFL teacher? He wouldn't even speak to me that day I came round and drank tea on your balcony. He just disappeared when he heard us coming. Maybe he doesn't like foreigners.'
         'Oh but he does, he does. He loves foreigners. He loves Dickens and Shelley and Byron. He has all their books (no one knows this, they are hidden away under his bed, it's still not safe to show them to everybody). He speaks English very well: he taught me. He passed on his love of English to me. It's just that... well, he suffered in the Cultural Revolution. His students, they... they, the red guards, they came here and beat him up. They knew he had foreign books here, and they were forbidden. But he refused to hand them over, and they couldn't find them (because my mother had taken them to the country side, hidden in straw), so they beat him up, and he hasn't been able to work since, because they damaged his eyes. He never goes out, because those people are still around in the college.
         'And now he says he hates foreigners, because they brought him trouble in the past. And who knows what the future will bring? This is why I am so careful, keeping on the right side of the leaders. I try very hard, but they would be happy if I made a mistake.
         'We're from a very good family. A landlord's family. My grandfather was educated in Shanghai: he died in the revolution. They killed him. Both my parents joined the Party. They didn't know what Mao would do. They couldn't believe they would be punished for having some books. My father taught me English secretly. He always wanted me to leave China and go to England to see Speaker's Corner, except for the fog, of course that can't be very nice, but he thinks I will be safe there, and his grandchildren..'

    < 18 >

         'Grandchildren! Come on, girl, we've only slept together a few times. I can't start thinking about other people's grandchildren.'
         I'm joking but I start to think about how I could get some Durex sent over. That would put a stop to any grandchildren. By this time she is sobbing. So I say, 'Don't worry. I'll come and see your parents. I'll promise them I'll take care of you.'
         I take her in my arms and start to undo the buttons on her blouse. Her breasts are tiny, with brown nipples, like the delicate stems of some kind of exotic fruit. And all the time I am thinking how can I get an order to Ashby-de-la-Zouche, and how long will they take to arrive?


    Silk worms

    When I was a child I always kept silk worms, so as soon as the mulberry tree was in leaf I take some round for you. There is one branch with many leaves, and two silk worms. You take it from me uncertainly and put it in a jam jar on your desk.
         'Won't they crawl away?' you ask, as the two grey creatures swayed from one leaf to another.
         'No, they never leave the mulberry. And anyway these are about to start spinning.'
         'How do you know?'
         'I just know,' I say. 'Maybe they are a little slower or a little fatter. They are just finding a nice leaf to sleep on.'
         'I wish I could find a nice leaf, take a long nap, and wake up a butterfly,' he says.
         'But you wouldn't wake up if you were a silk worm. Someone would take you and plunge you into hot water and then unwind your silk and steal it!'
         'Not these two. I'll keep them safe from the Silk Road.'
         We call them Yin and Yang. I am glad to see that he watches them spin their cocoons with the same fascination that I do, even after all these years of watching the same miracle.
         But then you lose interest. One day I come round and the jam jar has gone. You've put them on the balcony. You didn't want to sit and imagine the grubs evolving into winged creatures, imaging how delighted they would be to find they had wings and could fly wherever they wanted. I think this is because you can fly and go wherever you want. It isn't anything special for you. You can even go to places in China where I am not allowed to go. For the first time I feel angry with you, for having things I don't have, and for not even realising it. How clumsy you can be, putting your big feet everywhere. You came here, knowing nothing, expecting to teach us, who knew far more about the grammar of the English Language than you did. And yet as I say this, I know it's not true. You did know better about some things. How to fill in university application forms for Canada and the US, how to write the application letter, and do the sample essay they require. You are encouraging half the young lecturers to try to leave China. And I too, I want to go with you and see the other half of the world. I am just as bad as they are. Worse even, because I am pretending to be different.

    < 19 >


    Tea

    There's a special kind of tea called golden needle tea (I think). You put the leaves at the bottom of the cup, pour on the hot water (from the ubiquitous flask with its green or pink flowers) and watch them rising and falling several times. It reminded me of those Japanese paper flowers you used to get in Christmas stockings sometimes, or those flannels that come in a block the size of a matchbox, and then miraculously unfurl in the bath water. Except that these rose and fell several times. I used to have a tiny windup boat in the bath: maybe that's what I'm thinking of. So many crass comparisons for something magical.
         I have changed in so many ways, being here with MingMing. Yes, I can now use chopsticks, and drink green tea. I've forgotten about the BBC and think the Guardian is always tiny and printed on crackly paper. I've hardly spoken to my parents, and I used to be such a mummy's boy, taking my washing round to her and borrowing money from Dad knowing he wouldn't ask me to pay it back. I've stopped thinking about Kate all the time. I don't even care if she has found someone else. I've found I quite like teaching too: I've even written to the British Council to ask about getting a job with them somewhere more, well more capitalist, after this.
         I expect you'll say I've grown up. I used to be brash and noisy and crass. I cringe now to remember how I shouted at those poor women about turning down the loudspeaker outside my window. How I offended poor Professor Ning when he read me his dreadful poetry and I laughed at him. I've learned from MingMing how to look at things carefully, and find small pleasures. I'm grateful to her for all this, but if I'm honest, I am beginning to feel restless again. I've agreed to the wedding idea, because I don't want to hurt her, but I still haven't told my parents. The look on their faces when I turn up with a Chinese wife! I can imagine standing outside their semi in Chorlton, but when they close the door behind us, what then? I'm sure they'll love her, of course they will. She is love personified. She will look after me, and fuss about keeping my feet dry, and give, and give and give. But is this what I want?

    < 20 >


    Unit

    In China we all live in units. When people ask you where you live, they mean which unit. Our unit is the college. We have our own shop, post office, clinic, kindergarten, free market and schools. We have our own quotas for meat (lean and fatty), hot water, cloth, oranges, rice, flour, and babies.

    Our unit has completed its quota for this year already.


    Vinegar

    Her mother has made her a red silk qi-pao, you know, the old style of dress, very slim over the hips, with tiny knotted fastenings in a row above her left breast. There is some rather ugly flower embroidery, but she says it is traditional for an engagement party dress. I give her a necklace from the Friendship Store. Pseudo old style I think, with tiny carved beads on a red string. She doesn't want a ring till we go to the UK. No one here wears rings. That's what the old landlords used to do, and look what happened to them.
         The college is giving us a banquet. Ten courses of Hunan specialities. The heads of departments are there, the party members, her parents, some colleagues from the department. After every course there is a toast. They toast, I toast, everyone speaks except the bride to be. That is the tradition. They sing, then they ask me to sing. All I can think of is Auld Lang Syne. We eat sea cucumber and wood ears, burnt stinky dofu (Chairman Mao's favourite dish), frogs' legs, beef stomach, inners and gizzards of every kind. The College Deputy is a woman called Luo. Madame Luo keeps asking the waiters to add vinegar to the wine like the Manchu empresses used to do. She says it will promote long life to the happy couple. She toasts us in vinegar and I toast her back, to the long friendship between China and the UK. We drink over and over again to the eternal friendship of our two nations (I'm sure I heard someone say USA by mistake but he was shushed down). To future happiness, sons and grandsons... I get very red in the face, as does everyone else. I hug the College Deputy, all the professors, their wives, the semi-professors and their wives, the party faithful, the bride's parents (who were also red with drink) and the bride. I'm sure now that I am doing the right things. Do come for the wedding. We've fixed a date for next month.

    < 21 >


    Wedding

    In the past, the bride would be carried from her parents' house to that of her in-laws, and only then would the veil over her face be raised. That would be the first time she saw her husband. What must it have been like? I'm glad we did it this way. We looked and looked and fell in love.
         A week before the wedding he wanted me to spend all night with him. I said no, not possible. Just wait a week. So we went to his bed during afternoon rest time. We made love and it hurt me a little, and I couldn't hide it.
         So then I told him. About going to the clinic. And as I spoke, his face filled with horror. I'd read about it in books, but I'd never seen it happen before me. My father once tried to describe the look on his brother's face when they gave him the ticket to Urumuchi, and told him he couldn't see Xiao Ping again. He never told me what they did to her. All the time Mar Tin was shouting at me I was thinking about her. Was she in the same situation as me? Had nothing changed in a generation? I could do nothing about it: they'd talked to me all night, and in the morning exhausted with lack of sleep and argument, they'd taken me to the clinic, and waited outside the door while it was done. They said that was the right thing to do.
         But Mar Tin didn't see it that way. How could he? He'd been sleeping soundly.
         Now, it seemed I would lose him, and then they'd really get me. They'd accuse me of immorality, and what then? How could I imagine what they would do to me?
         'They told you to do this, horrible thing, and you just did it? Without asking me? The father? How could you? This horrible place, you're all murderers.'


    eXecutions

    The day before I left for Beijing and the plane home I was in the Friendship Store on May 1st Avenue, trying to find gifts to take home. My new Minder, Xiao Hong, was with me. She was as ugly as the proverbial back of a bus, and spoke to me only when she had to, and then with palpable horror. I drifted round the aisles undecided: Tang dynasty horses? Packets of tea? Double sided embroidery of kittens?

    < 22 >

         Suddenly there was a commotion outside and everyone rushed out in the street to see lorries going by carrying men and women with placards round their necks in red writing, dripping, to show how hastily they had been written. Their names and their crimes. I could only glimpse their stunned white faces, and could hardly take in the crowd roaring with anger.
         'Criminals off to be executed,' said Xiao Hong calmly. 'Our government is cracking down on crime.'
         'What sort of things have they done?' I asked.
         'It was on the TV last night. Cat thefts, what do you say, cat burglars, climbing into people's flats. Embezz...embezzlement. Murder. Rape.'
         'And the women?'
         'Immorality.' She wanted me to ask her what she meant by that. She'd say, falling in love with foreigners, sex before marriage. She wouldn't say, having an abortion, because that was normal in this looking glass world. Nor would she say calling off a marriage because she'd changed her mind.
         She can't have changed her mind. That wasn't her style. However pressurised I'd never doubted her honesty. Was it all a bluff to get me into trouble? No, surely she must have been under pressures she'd only hinted at. Maybe she couldn't go through with it for my sake.
         Suddenly I saw how brave she had been, pushing for what she wanted against all the odds. I hadn't seen it till then, as the lorries went by with the crowds baying for their blood. This is what it must have been lik
  • Helen , The Baby Fox

    2008-3-08

    SYNOPSIS:  

    Early spring in Hokkaido, northern Japan. Taichi, a young boy who tends to be a dreamer, has just arrived from the big city to live with his mother’s new boyfriend, a veterinarian, and his daughter. One day after school, Taichi discovers the cub of a northern fox crouching near the side of the road and despite the objections of those around him, decides to take care of the lovable creature. The baby fox cannot see, cannot hear and cannot bark. Even when offered milk, it just ignore. So Taichi names it Helen, after Helen Keller, the first blind, deaf and mute woman who was able to communicate using the sign language. Helen responds to Taichi’s devoted caring efforts and begins to strive for live, in spite of her frail body. The boy and his veterinarian family watch over her with encouragement and love.

    MOVIE REVIEW

    Imagine a boy and his puppy-like fox, on a sunny day, roaming freely through ever so-green meadows with yellow blooming daisies and white dandelions flurrying past in the wind. Everything is just that serene and relaxed, just the sound of the light wind. Brilliant cinematography from all angles captures and presents awesome, breathtaking landscape.

    More importantly, apart from it, audience witnessed and be touched by the pristine, heartwarming relationship between the little boy, Taichi and a baby fox, the subject of his newly-found “guardianship”, not by intention though.

    The baby fox is special from the normal breed, with its handicapped hearing, eyesight and “speech”. So that’s how it is named as “Helen” after Helen Keller. The poor cub seems to be isolated in its own helplessly soundless world and left deserted by its own species to struggle for survival.

    The unspeakable affinity felt by Taichi towards little Helen is more than just caring for a poor, abandoned animal. But perhaps he can see himself in Helen and be reminded of the occasional surges of feelings being left behind by his mom under the care of his soon-to-be stepfather, the veterinarian and his elder step-sister. Whereas the baby fox is even worse than him, it cannot take care of itself and rely on Taichi. So he is very determined to nurse Helen back to good health before returning it to its natural habitat, be with its family. As time passes by, the inevitable bond gradually grows between both. Little Helen can sense the world through Taichi and recognize his touch, footsteps. And even “barks” miraculously for Taichi.

    Besides the baby fox being the focus, it is like a “Babe” farm over here too. It is an amicable, wacky family of Man and animals under one warm roof. A “glutton-like” dog (that looks like adult Quill – Quill was the dog in the last film of same producer), a goat, an “always damsel in distress” parrot, rabbits etc makes the more the merrier so as to speak of. The process of taking care of Little Helen also effectively breaks the ice that allows Taichi, the veterinarian and his daughter to understand one another better and bonds them closer as a real family, overcoming the initial barriers.

    The bambi-eyed, cute boy, Taichi (Arashi Fukasawa) has wowed over the audience with his young, acting skills that is natural. It seems like the Japanese artiste world has another blooming child actor to be fully nurtured in the near future. He has displayed great chemistry and showed genuine affection towards his main co-star, the baby fox. I guess it is not that hard to fall in love with the extremely adorable, cuddly cub but it really does take a certain real fondness of animals out of a person to “interact” and “act” comfortably with a non-human, regardless how excellent the animal trainer might be.

    A lasting impression of foxes, long depicted as cunning animals in fairy tales or other children books, lingers in my mind since childhood. And feel there is this little tinge of irony and amazement that this film shows they can be as vulnerable and be tamed as others. Their young cubs resemble ordinary pet puppies in the movie.

    The surprising duo, Takao Osawa and Tasuko Matsuyuki, as the single parents of the two children, are familiar faces, having acted in Japanese TV drama series. Their scenes together on the big-screen (for the first time I remembered), though is short, has added the extra spice to the movie.

    A good educational, gratifying film suitable for all ages.

  • World publics think China will catch up with the US.

    2008-3-08

    World Publics Think China Will Catch Up With the US—and That’s Okay

    Full Report (PDF)
    Questionnaire (PDF)
    Methodology/Research Partners (PDF)

    CCGA+_RiseChina_img.jpgMajorities around the world believe that China will catch up with the United States economically. It’s a prospect that leaves most of those polled—even Americans—unperturbed.

    A window washer works on a skyscraper in Shanghai, China (Fumiko)

    A multinational poll by The Chicago Council on Global Affairs and WorldPublicOpinion.org finds that in most countries polled, majorities or pluralities believe the Chinese economy will grow to be as large as the US economy. In no country do most people think this would be mostly negative. Majorities in every country polled believe this is either a good thing or equally positive and negative.

    “What is particularly striking is that despite the tectonic significance of China catching up with the US, overall the world public’s response is low key—almost philosophical,” said Steven Kull, editor of WorldPublicOpinion.org.

    This sanguine reaction is not because China is widely trusted. World publics do not trust China any more than they trust the United States and distinctly less than they trust Japan.

    This is the fifth in a series of releases from a wide-ranging international survey, which was conducted in countries that represent 56 percent of the world’s population: China, India, the United States, Russia, Indonesia, France, Thailand, Ukraine, Poland, Iran, Mexico, South Korea, the Philippines, Australia, Argentina, Peru, Armenia and Israel, plus the Palestinian territories. Not all questions were asked in all countries. Not all questions were asked in all countries.

    Bullish on China

    CCGA+_RiseChina_graph1.jpgOf the 15 countries asked whether it was “likely that someday China’s economy will grow to be as large as the U.S. economy,” majorities agreed in eight and pluralities in five.

    The Chinese themselves are among the more skeptical countries. Only 50 percent say that their economy will catch up to the US economy. That is considerably less than the percentage of Americans who believe China’s economy will grow to be as large as theirs (60%).

    It’s also less than those polled in Peru (76%), Israel (75%), France (69%), Iran (64%), Russia (62%), Argentina and South Korea (both 61%). The percentage of Chinese respondents who believe their country will catch up with the United States is even lower than the average of respondents in all 15 countries surveyed (54%).

    In only two countries do those believing “the US economy will always stay larger than China’s” outnumber those who think China will catch up. Filipinos say the US economy will remain larger by a margin of 42 percent to 38 percent. Indians also tend to believe this by 36 percent to 22 percent, though even larger numbers refuse to answer (42%).

    China’s Rise Neither Good nor Bad

    CCGA+_RiseChina_graph2.jpgAsked how they would feel if China were to catch up with the United States, publics show little concern. In no country among the 13 asked does even a plurality say that this would be mostly negative. The most common view is that this would be equally positive and negative, with slightly more saying that it would be positive than saying it would be negative.

    The highest level of concern is in the United States, where one in three is worried. But a majority of Americans (54%) say instead that China’s economic rise would be “neither positive nor negative” while another one in ten (9%) say it would be mostly positive.

    This idea that China’s rise would be equally positive and negative is also the most common view in France (46%), the Philippines (42%), and Israel (41%). However in France, those who believe this would be mostly negative outnumber those who say it would be positive by 29 percent to 20 percent. In the Philippines, the reverse is true: More say this would be positive (26%) than negative (17%). Even in Israel—which looks to the United States for support—more say it would be positive (27%) than negative (17%).

    In Russia—which may view China as both a rival and a counterweight to the United States—negative and positive views about China’s rise are almost equally balanced. Thirty-four percent say it would be equally positive and negative, while almost exactly the same numbers say it would be positive (22%) as negative (24%). Reactions in Poland and India—both of which tend to have fairly positive views of the United States—are similarly balanced. Poles are indifferent overall, with 22 percent calling China’s rise positive, 21 percent negative and 34 percent both equally. In India, negative and positive views are also roughly equal (31% and 28%, respectively) though fewer say it is equally negative and positive (20%).

    Only in Iran does a majority (60%) say that it would be mostly positive for China to catch up. Their favorable outlook may stem in part from heavy Chinese investment in Iranian oil as well as Iranian desires to have a counterweight to American power. But the view that this would be positive is also the most common response in Mexico (38%), Argentina (34%), Thailand (34%), and Ukraine (30%).

    On average, across all countries polled, the most common response is that seeing China catch up with the United States would be equally positive and negative (32%), though those who think it would be mostly positive (29%) outweigh those who think it would be negative (20%).

    China and the US: Equally Distrusted

    CCGA+_RiseChina_graph3.jpgThe world’s seemingly sanguine view of Chinese possible economic ascendance does not mean most publics think they can trust Chinese leaders. Ten out of 15 publics polled say they do not trust China “to act responsibly in the world.” On average, those who say they cannot trust China “at all” or “very much” outnumber those who say they can trust it “somewhat: or a great deal” by 52 percent to 38 percent (10 percent do not answer).

    “Though people are not threatened by the rise of China, they do not appear to be assuming that it will be a new benign world leader,” said Christopher
    Whitney, executive director for studies at The Chicago Council on Global Affairs. “They seem to have a clear-eyed view that China is largely acting on its own interests.”

    Attitudes toward China in this respect are similar to attitudes toward the United States, which is also distrusted in 10 out of 15 publics polled, Those who distrust the United States outnumber those who trust it by 53 percent to 41 percent (6 percent do not answer).

    But this does not mean that people simply do not trust major powers. There is substantially more confidence in Japan, which is trusted to act responsibly in 10 out of 16 countries. On average the margin is slightly in favor of trusting Japan by 46 percent to 43 percent (11 percent do not answer).

    Those most likely to distrust China are the French. Three out of four French respondents (76%) say they feel that China can either not be trusted at all (33%) or not very much (43%). That’s even more than those who distrust the United States (72%). Peruvians are also strongly inclined to distrust China (70%) as are Argentines (65%) and South Koreans (61%).

    Thais (59%), Americans (58%) and Russians (56%) are about equally doubtful that China can be trusted to act responsibly. In Thailand (53%) and the United States (60%) majorities also say that China does not take their country’s interests into account when making foreign policy. A plurality agrees in Russia (47% to 42%).

    Pluralities tend to think China cannot be trusted in India (49% to 42%), Israel (47% to 42%) and in Poland (47% to 28%), though large numbers of Poles are not sure (25%).
    Israelis (61%) and Poles (69%) also say Chinese foreign policy does not take their interests into account. Indians also lean toward this opinion (46% to 43%).

    Those most likely to believe China can be trusted include three of its Asian/Pacific neighbors: Australia (59%), Indonesia (59%) and the Philippines (57%). The trade of all four countries with China is growing rapidly. Australia and the ASEAN countries (which include Indonesia and the Philippines) are negotiating free trade agreements with growing economic ties with China. Ukrainians also tend to trust China (46% to 29%) even though they do not think that it takes their interests into account in foreign policy decisions (62%).

    The countries that do not trust China also tend to be those that do not trust the United States. Two South American countries are the most distrustful of the United States: Argentina (84%) and Peru (80%). Russia is next with 73 percent saying the United States cannot be trusted. Two-thirds of Russians (66%) also say that US foreign policy does not take Russian interests into account. Most French respondents also say the United States cannot be trusted (72%).

    Indonesia is an exception to the rule that countries tend to distrust both powers. Although Indonesians trust China, they do not trust the United States (64%). Armenia is another: divided about China but distrustful of the United States (58%).

    Majorities in China (59%), Thailand (56%), South Korea (53%) and India (52%) also regard the United States with suspicion. A majority of the Chinese (58%) also say that the United States does not take their interests into account when making foreign policy, as do pluralities in Thailand (49% to 23%, 28% not sure) and India (46% to 44%).

    A slim majority of Poles (51%) trust the United States to act responsibly even though a far larger one (76%) says that US foreign policy does not their interests into account. Ukrainians also tend to trust the United States (49% to 37%) although they do not think it considers their interests (63%). Four out of five Israelis both trust the United States (81%) and believe it takes their interests into account (82%).

    In contrast, the other great Asian economy—Japan—gets a considerably more positive reaction from world publics. Majorities or pluralities in 10 of the countries polled say that it can be trusted to act responsibly, led by Indonesia (76%), Australia (72%), the United States (71%) and the Philippines (67%). A majority of the French (59%) also trust Japan.

    On the other hand, the United States is the only country out of eight asked where a majority believes that Japan takes its interests into account when making foreign policy decisions.

    Majorities in six countries say Japan cannot be trusted, led by two countries invaded by Japan during World War II: South Korea (81%) and China (79%). The Peruvians (60%) are also leery of Japan as are Thais (60%), Argentines (52%) and Russians (51%).

    Asian/Pacific Views of International Influence

    Asian/Pacific publics see China’s influence in the world as high, though not as high as the United States’. But they believe that China already wields nearly as much or more influence as the United States does in Asia.

    Ten countries were asked to rate the world influence of the United States, China and Japan on a scale of 0 to 10, where 10 indicated the most influence. All 10 publics ranked the United States’ influence as higher than China’s. But China is close behind and on a par with Japan.

    South Korea gives US influence a high 8.5, China a 6.7 and Japan a 6.5. Thai opinion is similar: the United States rates an 8.3 while China and Japan get the same score of 6.9. Indians rate US international influence slightly lower (7.3) though still higher than either Japan (6.2) or China (6) while Australians give the United States only a 6.1, only slightly above either Japan (5.7) or China (5.5).

    Only Indonesia believes Japan’s influence surpasses both China’s and the United States’. Indonesia gives all three rather modest rankings: 6.9 for Japan, 6.4 for the United States and 6.3 for China.

    China gives itself a 7.8, less than the 8.6 it gives to the United States but considerably above the 6.7 it gives to Japan. Americans give their country an 8.5 and rate the world influence of China and Japan as equal (6.4 both).

    Four Asian/Pacific countries generally see China as already wielding nearly as much or more influence in Asia as the United States does. Australians and the Chinese themselves see China as more influential than the United States, though Indians and Indonesians see it as slightly less so.

    China, India, Australia and Indonesia were asked to rate the influence in Asia of China, the United States and Japan on the same 0-10 scale.

    The Chinese gave both themselves and the United States a score of 8, the highest scores given by any country, while giving Japan a 6.8. Australians think Chinese influence in Asia rates a 7.5, higher than that given by Aussies to the United States or to the Japanese (6.6 for both).

    Indians place China’s influence in Asia at 5.9, below Japan’s (6.2) and well below the United States (7.1). Indonesians give China a 7, less than the United States’ 7.5 and Japan’s 7.3

    Relations Seen as Improving or Stable

    While most publics express distrust of China and the United States, views are mixed about whether relations are now moving in a positive or negative direction. Asked whether their relations with the United States and with China are improving, getting worse or staying the same, six out of 11 countries polled tend to say they are getting better in both cases, while the other five say they are staying the same.

    Australia is the only country with a majority (59%) saying relations with China are on the upswing, though this is also the predominant view in India (50%), Indonesia (49%), Thailand (48%), Russia (44%) and Israel (40%). In the other countries, the most common view is that their country’s association with China is stable: Ukraine (58%), Poland (52%), Armenia (49%), South Korea (47%) and the United States (47%).

    Majorities in Asia’s two most populous countries—India (58%) and China (53%)—see relations on the United States as getting better. This opinion is shared by pluralities in Australia (50%), Armenia (48%), Indonesia (46%) and Thailand (37%). The others say relations are stable: Poland (60%), South Korea (56%), Israel (52%), Ukraine (52%) and Russia (45%).

    Free Trade More Popular in Asia than in US

    Four Asian countries are more open to free trade agreements with each other and with the United States than Americans are. Majorities in Thailand favor agreements with China (61%) or Japan (63%). Koreans also tend to look favorably on such accords, especially with China. Two-thirds would like such an agreement with China (66%) and a plurality of 50 percent (vs. 46% against) would like one with Japan. Pluralities in India also would like free trade with China (44% to 25%) and with Japan (48% to 26%).

    All four Asian countries polled support free-trade agreements with the United States. China has the largest majority in favor of such pacts: 66 percent say they would like a free trade agreement with the United States and only 19 percent say they would not. Three out of five Thais (60%) would also like such an accord, as would a majority of Indians (55%) and South Koreans (54%).

    In contrast, Americans themselves are somewhat leery of lowering their tariff barriers to Chinese or Japanese goods even in exchange for reciprocal action in favor of US goods. US respondents lean slightly in favor of free trade with their close ally Japan (47% to 43%) but a majority opposes such an agreement with China (56%).

    To read more about opinion in the individual countries surveyed, click here to view the full report (PDF).

    May 25, 2007
  • Cant agree with her more on these issues.

    2008-3-08

    I always liked Natalie Portman, not only because she is beautiful and pulled off many interesting roles on the screen , she has that total package which has all the likable factors and smartness in it to make herself stand out among the talented Hollywood stars. Offscreen, she also did some growing up, enrolling for her college education at harvard University. She graduated from the school in 2003 as finishing her psychology major.

    Here is some of her recent comments regarding Hillary Clinton and starting up her own company..... I could not agree with her more on what she said.

    ==========================================================Natalie Portman graces the April cover of Elle magazine to promote her period flick "The Other Boleyn Girl." Whole interview here.

    Highlights:


    On Hillary Clinton:

    A lot of the stuff people say about her, I hear it and my stomach falls because it's so sexist. You ask people why they don't like her and it's because her husband cheated on her! That was obviously not her choice. She's so much more polished and experienced than anyone else. Last night, a friend, a social worker in L.A. who works with underprivileged kids, was saying how these girls who have never been interested in politics before are so excited that a woman might be president. I mean, look how many women are in government...Hillary's one of, what, [a handful of] female senators?

    I also like Obama. I even like McCain. I disagree with his war stance--which is a really big deal--but I think he's a very moral person. I met him and Hillary on the same day, actually, when I went to Washington with Finca [a nonprofit that gives loans to businesswomen in developing countries]. Hillary was by far the smartest person I met that day. Just totally focused, and knew more about the issues than anyone else, and was so able to go from one thing to the other.

    On starting her own production company:

    It is proactive. It gives you more control over creating things, as opposed to having to get hired every single time. After you've worked for so long it's kind of annoying to have to be dependent in that way. With acting, getting work can be very passive. You're sort of subject to the whims and fashions of your moment. I've been working 15 years, and I know some years I get everything first and some years I read only uninteresting parts. I didn't want to just be at the mercy of whoever is making those decisions. Having your own company is a nice way to concentrate your ideas and make the kinds of movies you want to see.

  • Bjrok provoked Chinese media .

    2008-3-08

    Never liked her no matter how her songs were , she is just as hideous  as her fashion taste. Here is she making fool of herself again as shouting ''Tibet, Tibet" in front of her Chinese fans in Shang Hai.

    It would probably made her behaviour a bit more comprehensible and smarter  if she had said it on the Tibet soil... (still it would provoke 1.3billion Chinese in general.) but Bjork's touching on the Tibet  in Shanghai was  a NO, NO, NO.

    The following is Zhong Guo Wang's coverage on the matter.

    ========================================================

    Chinese furious at 'Tibet-independence' Bjork

    Even Roger Waters closed his mouth over his famous song "Watching TV" when he held a concert in Shanghai last year. But the famous alternative Icelandic singer Bjork's concert finale on Sunday night has provoked her live audience and later countless Chinese netizens when informed that she was declaring "Tibet! Tibet!" during her encore song: "Declare Independence".

    A man surnamed Wei who was present told the Global Times, the subsidiary international paper of the People's Daily, what the scene was like while the audience chanted the lyrics "raise your flag!" with the singer in the song "Declare Independence", and then Bjork suddenly shouted "Tibet! Tibet!"

    Wei said that some people around him were shocked but others might not even have noticed it since Bjork has heavily accented English. "They thought she might have just been using some meaningless exclamations like 'ho ho ho'."

    The Global Times quoted the Associated Press as saying that Bjork is known to have used lyrics to declare political support for various causes. For example, she dedicated the song to Kosovo while performing last month in Japan. Her video for the song shows her in a jumpsuit bearing the flags of Greenland and the Faroe Islands, the territories controlled by Denmark.

    But China has undisputed sovereignty over Tibet.

    Wei said that when the concert concluded, some Chinese people started to slam Bjork's surprising move. Later, Chinese netizens poured out their anger on many sites such as the web portal Sina.com. Even her previous Chinese fans were upset.

    Some have already worried that the singer may never come to China again.

    "The atmosphere was very strange, uncomfortable compared to the rest of the concert," Stephen Gow, a British teacher told the Associated Press. People didn't boo, Gow said, but they left the Shanghai International Gymnastic Center hurriedly.

    "If she shouted 'Bush go to hell' in the United States, she might have earned some applause, but imagine what would have happened to her if she had shouted 'long live Osama bin Laden'? She pressed her finger on a very sensitive Chinese subject," an audience member was quoted by the Global Times.

    Video courtesy of 66wz.com

    "Why don't those foreign governments and activists check how many American Indians and blacks and Australian aborigines were killed by white men before they scream their accusations?" A young female surnamed Wu spoke to China.org.cn.

    Bjork, 42, once attended a certain concert with the theme of "free Tibet", but she has never set foot on Tibetan soil. Many western entertainers make use of politics to create their images. The film Team America: World Police (2004) has already satirized this. What Bjork did was simply another ludicrous political show.

    The Chinese promoter, Emma Ticketmaster, had made no comment since the concert ended.

    Another of her loyal fans said, "It's no problem for her to express her differences, but when she does it in China, she is disrespectful to her Chinese fans. She's so selfish."

    (China.org.cn March 5, 2008)

  • My song choice at Karaoke

    2008-3-04

    I went to Karaoke with my Asian friends the other day and had lots of fun singing and  "howling" sometimes.

    Especially, Aiko dazzled us with her powerful voice singing ''Coming on over" and "You are still the one", "From the moment on",  many of Shania Twain's hit songs.

    You would probably agree with me that English Songs are not meant to be sang by anyone ,because they have to have a right voice and extra  controls over  the pitches and rhythms to make it sound like an English song. I have many friends who are crazy about English songs and put lots of  efforts on remembering lyrics and melodies but sadly,  they just dont seem to get the hang of it. It always ends up sounding  like neither an English song nor a Chinese song....... (Hate some Asian singers adding English lyrics  to their songs despite the fact that they cant even pronounce some english words properly. ) 

    But she was totally different , She sang so well that the rest of us were just staring at the screen and kept silence until she finish. Its very hard to imagine that such a powerful voice came out of a very soft and gentle girl's body. To more of my surprise , she turned out to be a  geeky girl who is currently working at HP's IT department. I did not expect much interesting stuff  from her when i first got introduced to her. Anyway, I am glad i was proved wrong  . I wish i could sing like Aiko someday in Karaoke and stun all my friends into silence , too : )

    I feel  my long gone passions about songs are back. I have to admit that i am actually the one who gives  English songs a very strong "Asian Touch"(whatever ...) when singing . But i feel may be i can offset my downside by choosing a right song for myself. And here is the list that i am practising right now .......(Actually , planning to practise........ got to find myself time for that ! )

    1.Save the best for  last  (Vanessa Williams )

    2.I have never been to me (Charlene)

    3.Oh, Life  (Des'ree )

    4, You are still the one (Shania Twain )